Week of 7/30

[scm1011]

Aug 2, 2018 8:15:54 GMT -5 icedcoffee said:

I hope whatever water you and the rest of this board has been drinking is fully consumed, because I do not need twins. LOL

Ditto. Aside from not being able to mentally handle it, it would cost us $1460 a week in daycare between a toddler and 2 infants, which would financially break us. 

[shauni27]

grover, I agree with icedcoffee--if your H would enjoy being home with 3 kiddos then it is something to think about. Mine would rather die, lol. You have time to figure it out

[mpc]

I'm a tiny bit jealous of all the twins popping up around here. I know that's a crazy thing to say, and not something that multiples moms like to hear (sorry).

I am so glad it's august because now when people say when are you due I can just say next month Technically my due date is october, but my delivery will most likely be september. The cashier at the grocery store last weekend asked me when I was due, I said septemeber, and she paused then said is it just a big baby? I will take all the pregnancy pains over people's dumb comments any day.

[mpc]

grover I don't think I could stay home with 3 kids that young. It'd be tough! I can see how it would be a bit demoralizing to know you were working and not making much more extra to contribute to the family though. I'm sure your H needs time to process all of this. You guys will figure it out!

[loira]

My H would love being a SAHD, but even if it made more sense financially for us, I'd rather have A in daycare. She's naturally a bit of an anxious kid, with quite a bit of separation anxiety, and she's improved so much in daycare since she started going. I think for her personality, it goes a long way to preparing her for an eventual school environment.

[ivy]

Daycare at our current center would exceed $5K a month for my toddler and 2 infants. That would eat up most of the take home from my cushy salary. A nanny would definitely be the best option for us, but I don't think I'm going back to work once the twins (eek!) are born. Even if it was a singleton I don't think I would. Corporate America is bleeding me dry and I need a break from it. Plus we have a ton of family here willing and able to help and lots of resources to stay busy. And DD will be in preschool. Otherwise I'm not sure I could handle it.

Interesting that you say you're a bit jealous, mpc . All the comments in here are making me feel a bit defensive of my situation, lol.

[pooh8402]

mpc and ivy, I was kind of hoping for twins. I know this will be my last baby as DH is dead set on being done once he turns 40 (which will be this November) but I'd always pictured myself with 3-4 kids.

[luv2rn4fun]

Aug 2, 2018 9:46:45 GMT -5 ivy said:

Daycare at our current center would exceed $5K a month for my toddler and 2 infants. That would eat up most of the take home from my cushy salary. A nanny would definitely be the best option for us, but I don't think I'm going back to work once the twins (eek!) are born. Even if it was a singleton I don't think I would. Corporate America is bleeding me dry and I need a break from it. Plus we have a ton of family here willing and able to help and lots of resources to stay busy. And DD will be in preschool. Otherwise I'm not sure I could handle it.

Interesting that you say you're a bit jealous, mpc . All the comments in here are making me feel a bit defensive of my situation, lol.

I totally wanted twins the first time around (because we had two losses and I dreaded TTC and all of that again). I would have warmed up to the idea while pregnant if we had had twins the second time around. But as a SAHM who survived 2u2 with little support, I wouldn’t wish it on anyone. It’s super hard.

I think your situation and setup will be great! You have family, lots to do, and your oldest will be in preschool. My DS1 didn’t start preschool until DS2 was 16 months old. I clearly remember wishing I could just send him to daycare most days...it would have been better for him and easier for me. Even now that they are 3.5 yo and 22 months, it’s constant energy and hardly any downtime from 6:30a-8p.

Everyone adapts to their situation though and push through! I know we would have and I know that no one ever regrets having a baby, just not going for another kid. I would love a third but my DH is firmly done.

[starryfish]

Aug 2, 2018 8:30:28 GMT -5 scm1011 said:

Aug 2, 2018 8:15:54 GMT -5 icedcoffee said:

I hope whatever water you and the rest of this board has been drinking is fully consumed, because I do not need twins. LOL

Ditto. Aside from not being able to mentally handle it, it would cost us $1460 a week in daycare between a toddler and 2 infants, which would financially break us. 

and another ditto......Financially I don't know how we would do it. We have no family here and we would be in the red with daycare for 3....I think we would have no choice but to do a nanny which I don't really want bc I love daycare.....Or maybe borrow from my parents for a few years to help cover daycare? I am doing my IUI this weekend and I really do NOT want twins this time (I would have been OK with twins first time, but not now). 

[belovedbride07]

OMG, congrats grover!

And ditto icedcoffee on hoping the water has been fully consumed and none left for the rest of us! I love having my twins, but oh boy, please not another set!

If any of you new twin moms-to-be want to talk twin stuff, let me know! I don't have any insight into the older sibling + twins logistics, but I'm happy to share any other advice (or just listen/reassure!) you might need!

[mpc]

ivy, a good friend of mine had an older child and then triplets, and while she said it was of course incredibly hard, she said there was also some benefit in the kids all going through the same stages at the same time. You do the puree thing for a while and then you are done with it for good, for example.

Like pooh8402, this is likely my last pregnancy but I always kind of pictured myself with more kids. It feels like twins were my last chance to make that happen. I know the pregnancy would have been harder and of course having two babies is no walk in the park. But people do it and they survive. You guys will survive too. I think it will be something really special, in hindsight at least, lol, when you aren't so sleep deprived.

[Mushe]

ivy, you’re going to be great! I’m so sorry if the comments are leaving you feeling defensive. I’m another that always wanted twins. I used to have dreams about it, and always wondered if they would be true.

[Mushe]

Exciting day here - B took her whole feeding from me by bottle! She has to take all feeds by mouth before they’ll take her NG tube out, and she hates the tube I’m so proud, though! She took only 15ml previously, and this was 36.

[scm1011]

ivy, i'm so sorry if my comment hit a nerve. I do also think its very exciting. You got this, mama!

Mushe, very exciting! I've loved following along on your journey via your blog. B is such a super-preemie!

[shauni27]

Mushe, yes yes yes! I love the updates <3

[luv2rn4fun]

Mushe- way to go B!!! I love reading all her updates on your blog! It literally gets me out of bed some mornings, excited to read about her progress (and how you and N are doing as wel) while drinking my coffee!

ivy- so sorry if any of my comments were hurtful as well. Like I said before, it looks like you have a setup that will allow it to be much easier and realistic! We would not have had that so it would have made it even more challenging. I am sure you will do great! And I have always loved the idea of twins!

[Mushe]

You guys are so sweet! The nurse today, who I really like, offered to sign up as her primary. It really helps IMO to have a person following your baby that way.

She referred to B today as IUGR, but we’ve never been told that she qualified. I wonder if she just assumed, based on her size? The doctor who did the growth scan specifically said he didn’t see evidence of growth restriction.

[konapoppy]

grover, congrats! It took a long time for H and I to be more excited than terrified about the twins. So far the pregnancy was the worst part. The rest has been pretty fun. My former boss had a 2 year old followed by identical twins, and now they are 9 and 7. It has been crazy but fun for them.

I also am happy to talk about twins anytime!

Mushe that is a great update (not the iugr possibility, but the rest )

[cherryvalance]

ivy, I totally wanted twins the first time around. We transferred our last two during our successful cycle and I was legitimately sad they both didn't take. With DS being so little and my mom taking care of him, it was a very different sentiment this time around, lol, but twins are so sweet.

[konapoppy]

This post is also missing pictures of twins

[loira]

konapoppy, so freaking cute!

Add me to the list of people who kind of wanted twins the first time around. I won't have another because I can't handle being pregnant again, so it would have been nice to have 2 for the 1 pregnancy.

[starryfish]

Aug 2, 2018 19:51:17 GMT -5 konapoppy said:

View Attachment

This post is also missing pictures of twins

Adorable!!!!! I wanted twins the first time too lol 😆

[cactuscookie]

konapoppy, so cute!!!

Sounds like wanting twins the first time is a theme for TTTC people. I was hoping for that too, since I doubted I'd be able to get pregnant again.

[grover]

konapoppy, your girls are adorable!

[konapoppy]

Aug 2, 2018 20:54:49 GMT -5 grover said:

konapoppy, your girls are adorable!

Thanks! It is hard to get a good picture these days now that they are mobile 😂

[cherryvalance]

Aug 2, 2018 20:46:46 GMT -5 cactuscookie said:

konapoppy, so cute!!!

Sounds like wanting twins the first time is a theme for TTTC people. I was hoping for that too, since I doubted I'd be able to get pregnant again.

Makes sense. After all the treatments, it would be nice to deal with stressing over one pregnancy, but getting a couple of kids.

[thoseareradishes]

Aug 2, 2018 20:46:46 GMT -5 cactuscookie said:

konapoppy , so cute!!!

Sounds like wanting twins the first time is a theme for TTTC people. I was hoping for that too, since I doubted I'd be able to get pregnant again.

My RE asked if I wanted to transfer two CCS tested embryos and I was like HELL NO.  I was really not comfortable with twins and I can't imagine what would have happened if the same thing happened with a twin pregnancy as what happened with E.  She was pretty big for a 24 weeker and still stayed in the NICU for 4 months.  

[konapoppy]

Aug 2, 2018 21:06:53 GMT -5 cherryvalance said:

Aug 2, 2018 20:46:46 GMT -5 cactuscookie said:

konapoppy , so cute!!!

Sounds like wanting twins the first time is a theme for TTTC people. I was hoping for that too, since I doubted I'd be able to get pregnant again.

Makes sense. After all the treatments, it would be nice to deal with stressing over one pregnancy, but getting a couple of kids.

Okay, sorry, I have to be "that twin mom". The pregnancy is not just stressful - it is high risk. I can't speak for a fraternal twin pregnancy experience, but identical twin pregnancies are very closely monitored to ensure one twin isn't getting more blood than the other. If they are, it can be deadly for one or both twins. A twin mom on here recently had to have the the laser surgery while she was pregnant since she developed TTTS. I had 20 ultrasounds during my pregnancy to ensure the girls were doing well and was induced before 37 weeks to increase the odds of them arriving safely.

I can totally appreciate the dream of one pregnancy and having an instant family, but it was the most difficult thing I have ever gone through. (sorry if I stressed you out, newly pregnant twin folks. I LOVE my girls and can't imagine life any other way)

[dellabear]

Congrats grover, wow!

No babies over here. DD was asking recently if I'd have another and I told her I'm too old. Which technically probably isn't true but I sure feel it, lol. I am definitely too tired. Although every month I still have that twinge of sadness on CD1. I wonder if that ever goes away. I'm not really sad that I can't do it again, more like sad that my turn at doing it is over, if that makes sense.

[cherryvalance]

Aug 2, 2018 22:40:28 GMT -5 konapoppy said:

Aug 2, 2018 21:06:53 GMT -5 cherryvalance said:

Makes sense. After all the treatments, it would be nice to deal with stressing over one pregnancy, but getting a couple of kids.

Okay, sorry, I have to be "that twin mom". The pregnancy is not just stressful - it is high risk. I can't speak for a fraternal twin pregnancy experience, but identical twin pregnancies are very closely monitored to ensure one twin isn't getting more blood than the other. If they are, it can be deadly for one or both twins. A twin mom on here recently had to have the the laser surgery while she was pregnant since she developed TTTS. I had 20 ultrasounds during my pregnancy to ensure the girls were doing well and was induced before 37 weeks to increase the odds of them arriving safely.

I can totally appreciate the dream of one pregnancy and having an instant family, but it was the most difficult thing I have ever gone through. (sorry if I stressed you out, newly pregnant twin folks. I LOVE my girls and can't imagine life any other way)

Oh, I think everyone knows multiples come with very high risks, but I didn't want to make that too big of a focal point in a thread where people are stressing about having twins. A lot of people did that before my induction and it stressed me out so much more.

Besides, I was really speaking to my own experience with finding pregnancy very anxiety-producing. I wake up nervous every day, just waiting for the next ultrasound or to finally be able to hear the heartbeat on my Doppler. In some ways, would it be nice to have our two kids and be done and not have had to do another round of IVF or deal with PGAL? Yes. (In SOME ways)