Something you wish was normalized…

[sadie]

Feb 26, 2023 17:28:26 GMT -5 litskispeciality said:

Feb 26, 2023 16:53:20 GMT -5 Jalapeñomel said:

Men who are short.

Again, stop commenting on people’s bodies. I have no idea why there’s a stigma around short men, as if there’s something wrong with being short.

And couples of the same height, or a taller female (presenting) partner.

Add to that tall women being normal and not getting comments about their height if they're not a model.

I always got, "You should play basketball" because I was tall.

[basilosaurus]

Feb 26, 2023 7:57:48 GMT -5 @villainv said:

Feb 26, 2023 7:35:57 GMT -5 UMaineTeach said:

My husband feels this way. He likes being an engineer. He doesn’t want to be a project manager. Every year at evaluation time they try to convince him that PM is the next step for him.

He probably has the skills, but no desire for that role.

This why I’m getting out of the military. They have a VERY pervasive “up or out” mentality. On one hand, I appreciate that deliberate development goes into each person, and our organization relies heavily on making technical experts who move into leadership roles and supervisory positions. We CAN’T hire outside our organization, so we have to promote from within. And even if i end up in a job I like, I have to mover every three years anyway….(This is for active duty only, Guard works a bit differently).

I have a lot of friends (as I'm sure you do as well) who transitioned to guard/reserves who are absolutely loving that life. More than a few punched at 18 despite the financial hit because they were just done.

[basilosaurus]

It's interesting that we're saying things that should be normalized and basically all agreeing. So it's normalized in our heads already. We just need to be vocal.

I'm that vocal person in my "dotage" lol. I talk about end of life. I unapologetically don't shave.

Fuck you for trying to hug me. I absolutely love that hugs and really any touching are not a thing in my current countries. I was that child punished for not hugging first thing in morning, when leaving the house, returning to the house, going to bed. Actual "go back to your room until you can come out and hug this relative you don't like." Then of course what followed was punishment for just staying in my room, reading I do think it's more normalized to accept non hugs than in my childhood, so there's improvement.

I recently got a pedicure (also should be normalized is not having pedicure even though I wear slippers nearly every day all year) and asked if I could also get a brow wax midway. She looked at my braidable leg hair and said she didn't have the time. We had a nice chuckle after I corrected the assumption.

I do wish there were more options for socializing than bars. I live in a predominately Muslim country (90%), so not drinking is perfectly normal, but most socializing for expats is in bars, plus it's duty free where I currently reside. No one gives any notice if you're not drinking, but if people are tempted yet trying to avoid it can be very difficult.

[litskispeciality]

Yes let's also normalize that female presenting people who don't get their nails done, esp pedicures in the open toe shoe season, are professional and not dirty. They're expensive, a lot of people have sensitive feet, the time to wait for an apt etc. It should be a luxury or treat rather than something you have to do for work, weddings, interviews etc.

[eb777888]

Feb 26, 2023 18:27:50 GMT -5 sadie said:

Feb 26, 2023 17:28:26 GMT -5 litskispeciality said:

And couples of the same height, or a taller female (presenting) partner.

Add to that tall women being normal and not getting comments about their height if they're not a model.

I always got, "You should play basketball" because I was tall.

David always got football comments because for a long time, he was taller and broader than most of the kids in his class. Never going to fucking happen, ever. He has zero interest in football. Fucking Texas. 

[erbear]

Feb 26, 2023 7:19:48 GMT -5 mrsukyankee said:

Feb 25, 2023 20:05:51 GMT -5 cherry1111 said:

Not having aspirations to climb the ladder at work.

If I’m content as an individual contributor just leave me be!

YES! This is me. My boss tried to convince me to work full year at the uni so he could promote me. No thanks. I like working term time only and don't want to be anything other than a counsellor. I'm good.

My life. People are always trying to tell me about open admin positions. It's highly unpopular to say that I actually really want to be a teacher. This isn't a stepping stone to something bigger and better.

[litskispeciality]

Feb 27, 2023 12:38:43 GMT -5 erbear said:

Feb 26, 2023 7:19:48 GMT -5 mrsukyankee said:

YES! This is me. My boss tried to convince me to work full year at the uni so he could promote me. No thanks. I like working term time only and don't want to be anything other than a counsellor. I'm good.

My life. People are always trying to tell me about open admin positions. It's highly unpopular to say that I actually really want to be a teacher. This isn't a stepping stone to something bigger and better.

Plus in my state it's a LOT of work to get an admin cert, and there's often maaaybe 5 admins, probably less than that. Going for all of that extra stuff doesn't guarantee getting the job. Let good teachers stay in the classroom. Generally speaking outside of teaching, give fair wages to employees who stay in the same spot if they're doing good work, esp if it's hard to move up. We need to eat too!

[fangoriagurkel]

Feb 25, 2023 8:38:09 GMT -5 wanderingback said:

No or no thanks being a complete sentence.

I see on here all the time people talking about white lie excuses of why they can’t do something. All of that is unnecessary! Just so no thanks.

I used to work with a woman who would simply say “I decline” and it kind of made her my hero.

[fangoriagurkel]

Feb 26, 2023 16:53:20 GMT -5 Jalapeñomel said:

Men who are short.

Again, stop commenting on people’s bodies. I have no idea why there’s a stigma around short men, as if there’s something wrong with being short.

I was taught to only comment on things people can change in under a minute. Spinach in their teeth, their slip is visible, or their fly is down etc…? Go ahead and let them know. Height or weight? 100% say nothing.

I wish more people were taught that mantra.

[eddy]

Feb 25, 2023 9:06:48 GMT -5 sadie said:

Taking earned vacation/sick time without issue/guilt trip.

And not working/replying over email when you are taking these breaks.

In my last job this was such an issue. No one ever clocked out and truly we were not doing that serious of work. It set such a bad example.

[ECB]

Feb 28, 2023 9:19:46 GMT -5 eddy said:

Feb 25, 2023 9:06:48 GMT -5 sadie said:

Taking earned vacation/sick time without issue/guilt trip.

And not working/replying over email when you are taking these breaks.

In my last job this was such an issue. No one ever clocked out and truly we were not doing that serious of work. It set such a bad example.

I'm hiring for a position on my team. One candidate replied in the evening to my email - I made a point to NOT reply until the next morning. I wanted HER to know that after hours work is not expected/the norm.

Then in our interview, she asked what our attitude is about "working on vacation" and I asked what she  meant.  She meant- will she ever have to take phone calls, etc, while I vacation.  I was like NOPE NOPE NOPE!!!!   I suspect she had issues with that at her last employer.  Not with me!! 

[Jalapeñomel]

Feb 28, 2023 9:19:46 GMT -5 eddy said:

Feb 25, 2023 9:06:48 GMT -5 sadie said:

Taking earned vacation/sick time without issue/guilt trip.

And not working/replying over email when you are taking these breaks.

In my last job this was such an issue. No one ever clocked out and truly we were not doing that serious of work. It set such a bad example.

I was just reading about teacher of the year in Arizona, and this person did like 15 clubs, started an after school program, and has a small child at home. I don't know how that's possibly without sacrificing your home-life and putting all the household responsibilities on your spouse. And this should not be expected, let alone praised. 

[shauni27]

Feb 25, 2023 14:19:09 GMT -5 mofongo said:

Feb 25, 2023 14:05:35 GMT -5 rupertpenny said:

Booze at children's birthday parties 

Def a thing here, at least in my circle! Ha

mine too, complete with signature cocktails.

Feb 28, 2023 3:23:35 GMT -5 fangoriagurkel said:

Feb 26, 2023 16:53:20 GMT -5 Jalapeñomel said:

Men who are short.

Again, stop commenting on people’s bodies. I have no idea why there’s a stigma around short men, as if there’s something wrong with being short.

I was taught to only comment on things people can change in under a minute. Spinach in their teeth, their slip is visible, or their fly is down etc…? Go ahead and let them know. Height or weight? 100% say nothing.

I wish more people were taught that mantra.

I really like this! I have never heard it, but it is a great mantra to keep in mind.

[bex1973]

Feb 28, 2023 3:23:35 GMT -5 fangoriagurkel said:

Feb 26, 2023 16:53:20 GMT -5 Jalapeñomel said:

Men who are short.

Again, stop commenting on people’s bodies. I have no idea why there’s a stigma around short men, as if there’s something wrong with being short.

I was taught to only comment on things people can change in under a minute. Spinach in their teeth, their slip is visible, or their fly is down etc…? Go ahead and let them know. Height or weight? 100% say nothing.

I wish more people were taught that mantra.

I have really been emphasizing this to my kid! I agree - I wish more people did.

[blondemoment123]

Tapatalk ate my post, but essentially I wish we would normalize talking about recovery, whether it be physical, emotional, etc.

The struggle is hard enough, so speaking about overcoming issues without shame should be celebrated, not discouraged, just because it could make people uncomfortable.

[fivechickens]

This is brought to you because of Real House Wives.

Can we normalize women not liking women because they simple don’t like them NOT because they are jealous. Women are capable not liking other women because the woman is just an asshole.

[maudefindlay]

Stop rewarding perfect attendance. Praise people taking a sick day and not infecting others.

[litskispeciality]

Mar 1, 2023 9:46:56 GMT -5 fivechickens said:

This is brought to you because of Real House Wives.

Can we normalize women not liking women because they simple don’t like them NOT because they are jealous. Women are capable not liking other women because the woman is just an asshole.

@@@
Quazi related, stop thinking women/wives/spouses should be friends with each other based on profession, their spouses profession or kids school or sports etc. Stop acting like their b!tches for not wanting forced friendships.