I think it's really weird when kids come to college with very specific career plans. I have tons of pre-meds, which is fine. But I get things like "I want to be an interventional radiologist" or "cardiopathologist" (I didn't know this was a specialty.)
I have one student who says she wants to be a cosmetic chemistry, and she can't prepare a solution in the lab to save her life. :-(
I don't really mind posting my budget but 1) I don't really have any questions or need for advice at the moment; 2) I am not convinced anyone cares; and 3) we don't really have much of a budget, so it would be more like "here's how much we make, here's what we spend on housing, here's what we spend on daycare, here's what we save--we have no idea what we do with the rest!" I guess that last part is flameful?
I would also love a popcorn machine (well, except that we have no room for one), although you really shouldn't use it unless you have one of these too: www.htmarket.com/1019.html
I would also love a popcorn machine (well, except that we have no room for one), although you really shouldn't use it unless you have one of these too: www.htmarket.com/1019.html
I don't really mind posting my budget but 1) I don't really have any questions or need for advice at the moment; 2) I am not convinced anyone cares; and 3) we don't really have much of a budget, so it would be more like "here's how much we make, here's what we spend on housing, here's what we spend on daycare, here's what we save--we have no idea what we do with the rest!" I guess that last part is flameful?
I've thought about posting our finances plenty of times, but it would be the same situation. I really just want input on how to invest and what to do with what's leftover. I don't want people telling me I pay outrageous amounts for XYZ and to cut ABC, because it's really not an issue. I feel like if I posted my budget and asked what to do with the leftovers it would make me look like an AW and I would get about 2 responses.
I don't really mind posting my budget but 1) I don't really have any questions or need for advice at the moment; 2) I am not convinced anyone cares; and 3) we don't really have much of a budget, so it would be more like "here's how much we make, here's what we spend on housing, here's what we spend on daycare, here's what we save--we have no idea what we do with the rest!" I guess that last part is flameful?
I've thought about posting our finances plenty of times, but it would be the same situation. I really just want input on how to invest and what to do with what's leftover. I don't want people telling me I pay outrageous amounts for XYZ and to cut ABC, because it's really not an issue. I feel like if I posted my budget and asked what to do with the leftovers it would make me look like an AW and I would get about 2 responses.
I got some very good responses about how to manage our remaining money every month, and I took a lot of the advice (ie- actively pay off 2nd mort instead of putting money into savings at <1%interest). I didn't think it was a waste.
I don't really mind posting my budget but 1) I don't really have any questions or need for advice at the moment; 2) I am not convinced anyone cares; and 3) we don't really have much of a budget, so it would be more like "here's how much we make, here's what we spend on housing, here's what we spend on daycare, here's what we save--we have no idea what we do with the rest!" I guess that last part is flameful?
I am #3. Except I'm even kinda cagey on how much we make, due to H's ever-changing commission situation.
People who are asking for gift ideas 6 days before Christmas make me LOL. People who have their shopping done don't want to do yours for you. Or asking where to find an obscure gift - um, the internet, three weeks ago.
And if anyone hasn't bought their gift for me yet, I would rather they not bother. I don't want whatever you could find quickly at whatever store was on your way home from work. Just own it and get me a gift card instead. That way at least I won't have to stand in a return line to get rid of your hastily grabbed obligation gift.
I spent about $200 in Christmas gifts this year despite being unemployed.
I used to be annoyed by certain people on this board, then I realized they are just products of their lives and honestly can't help it. The sorority comparison is spot on, I love all of you but dammit sometimes some people are not my favorites.
I lurked the MMM thread about the 19 year old college student that wants a baby NAO. I thought everyone was waaaaay too nice to her.
Oh I have something possibly flameworthy. I hate that there are certain posters who always jump in with the conclusion that someone's H is a douchebag, a jerk and ask why are you with him, etc. after they post something bad about their husbands. They are posting because they have an issue and they probably don't AW the good stuff. Putting down the H doesn't necessarily help. I seriously wonder if it is all puppies and rainbows for these posters.
I am with jen and hens on the budget front. If I posted our budget, I'd get flamed to high heaven for what we spend on certain catagories, and I know what we need to do - stop spending so much on random crap. So, I feel like posting it would be useless unless I was the picture of financial stability, in which case it might help others. But, I am not, and thus don't post.
I work hard to earn my random crap spending! And I love my random crap!
The idea of being a person who makes lots and lots of money and is the picture of financial stability kind of makes me sad. I mean, it is good to be responsible and to play for the future but what good is having lots of money if you don't let yourself spend it on fun, frivolous things too?
Why do you think you need to be the picture of financial stability to post? It's often times the people that aren't 100% on track that help me. It wouldn't be helpful, IMO, for the perfect budget to be posted... what do you say to them besides "good job"?
How about we make an agreement to not flame people for spending that they can clearly afford.
It's one thing to flame someone who is asking for advice and refuses to see sense. It's another to flame people for low charity contributions when all they are asking about is whether they can afford rent in Manhatten. Or what they should do with their leftover money.
Eta: Save your judgey observations for the flamefuls so we have something juicey to talk about
Why do you think you need to be the picture of financial stability to post? It's often times the people that aren't 100% on track that help me. It wouldn't be helpful, IMO, for the perfect budget to be posted... what do you say to them besides "good job"?
My concern is not about being the picture of financial stability--I feel like we have reasonably solid savings and live within our means, so I am not embarassed by how we are doing or anything. For me, the problem is an actual lack of knowledge about how to even categorize the random spending. I mean, I can't post a budget with no knowledge of the line items. I know how much we make, how much we save, what out PITI is, and roughly what our utilities are. Beyond that, I don't have a damn clue. We just charge what we need to for gas, groceries, clothes, travel, kid stuff, entertainment, etc. and then pay off the credit card bill at the end of the month. What we spend in each category varies wildly by the month, and we don't track it. As long as we are putting aside the designated savings amount, we just don't bother to worry about it.
I mean I guess I could post my info and let other people tell me what I should be spending in various categories, but I am not sure that is helpful to anyone.
Why do you think you need to be the picture of financial stability to post? It's often times the people that aren't 100% on track that help me. It wouldn't be helpful, IMO, for the perfect budget to be posted... what do you say to them besides "good job"?
I guess I just think that posting that I spend $2k on god knows what a month would lead to people telling me that I need to figure that out, to which I would reply, "yeah, I know." Not all that helpful to the board at large.
Also, I feel like I would then need to justify things like the $370 a month on dog walking or the $40 gel manicures I get so that I only need to hit the nail salon once every 2 weeks. And I don't feel like going down the "HCOL vs. VHCOL" and "no one NEEDS a manicure all the time" roads. Because, damn it, my nails look bad without polish.
I guess my thought is, so what if you spend $2k a month on "fluff". As long as you're doing what you want/need, then it doesn't matter how that money gets spent. It's when someone comes in posting they spend $2k on fluff when they make $3k
I guess my point is helpful to one person is probably not helpful to another. If I saw tons of people posting a cell phone bill of $85 and it was for two smart phones and data, I might look into how to decrease my $110 bill. Then I might see someone posting $300 on SLs and realize we have it pretty good with $140 each month.
There have actually been a few budgets posted that were very close to mine and it was eye opening to see how similar things can be across the board.
Obviously someone making $10k a month isn't going to benefit as much when a budget for $3k a month is posted unless they are trying to really cut back on spending... Still interesting to see
I work hard to earn my random crap spending! And I love my random crap!
The idea of being a person who makes lots and lots of money and is the picture of financial stability kind of makes me sad. I mean, it is good to be responsible and to play for the future but what good is having lots of money if you don't let yourself spend it on fun, frivolous things too?
Actually, I would love to see your budget, because I feel like we have similar random crap spending habits but you are way more on track with regards to retirement, etc.
Ha to budget!
The only secret I have there is that while you and I and your husband were toiling away in law school, my husband was off in the working world, maxing out his 401(k) and Roth IRA like a good little Eagle Scout. And those were good years, and he's a good investor, so despite the fact that I am only 3 years behind him contribution-wise, he has a ton more money saved for retirement than I do.
Also, we've never put money towards a down payment, which is what wipes out a lot of people's savings accounts...
I should put a before and after picture of yesterday's manicure so people can see what my nails look like when I file them versus when a pro does. I can't even FILE my nails in a presentable way. No way am I trying advanced techniques like painting them.
Why do you think you need to be the picture of financial stability to post? It's often times the people that aren't 100% on track that help me. It wouldn't be helpful, IMO, for the perfect budget to be posted... what do you say to them besides "good job"?
I guess I just think that posting that I spend $2k on god knows what a month would lead to people telling me that I need to figure that out, to which I would reply, "yeah, I know." Not all that helpful to the board at large.
Also, I feel like I would then need to justify things like the $370 a month on dog walking or the $40 gel manicures I get so that I only need to hit the nail salon once every 2 weeks. And I don't feel like going down the "HCOL vs. VHCOL" and "no one NEEDS a manicure all the time" roads. Because, damn it, my nails look bad without polish.
Now that I tag along with you for mani/pedis it's less frivolous 'social time' as we discussed And we would spend WAY more money at a bar in that hour and a half then what we do there.
Flameworthy around these parts- We tithe 10% of our gross income plus 2% to other charitable causes. This is twice as much as we put in to savings. Also, I feel no guilt about this.
I guess I am not here enough because I really can't figure out why anyone would really hate anyone else. Maybe I am just dense and overlooking some obvious personality conflicts on the board.
Post by krisandgrace on Dec 19, 2012 13:27:23 GMT -5
This is kind of flame worthy. I'm not shocked to to read someone who used to post on MM is heading for a divorce. I think a lot of people saw this coming back when they were just engaged and told her so.
This is kind of flame worthy. I'm not shocked to to read someone who used to post on MM is heading for a divorce. I think a lot of people saw this coming back when they were just engaged and told her so.
This is kind of flame worthy. I'm not shocked to to read someone who used to post on MM is heading for a divorce. I think a lot of people saw this coming back when they were just engaged and told her so.
Gee, thanks.
I just remembered who you were. I was going to ask why you do not post here anymore, but maybe now i get it. I am sorry you are going through this. Sorry other posters are being jerks!
This is kind of flame worthy. I'm not shocked to to read someone who used to post on MM is heading for a divorce. I think a lot of people saw this coming back when they were just engaged and told her so.
Gee, thanks.
({) ali (}) What happened? So sorry to hear about this.
Post by catsarecute on Dec 19, 2012 13:49:14 GMT -5
I received a Christmas card from a friend (G) of my best friend (M). M has a large circle of girlfriends and I've known G for many years. We don't hang out on our own but when the large group gets together for birthday parties or other occasions, we are friendly.
G just had a baby a month ago and also has a 7 year old daughter. I had a spare Coldstone gift card sitting in my wallet that I have no intention of using so I decided to include it in the Christmas card to G. My thought was she can use it as a date night with her husband or for she and her daughter to have some quality time together.
I sent the card a week ago. I haven't heard anything from her. We are facebook friends she is posts on FB several times a day. I'm mostly concerned that she thinks it was weird that I gave her this gift card but I was honestly just doing a random act of kindness and want to make sure she received it and that she doesn't think I'm strange for sending it!
I guess the flameworthy part of this is really that I think it is kind of rude of her not to send me a FB message saying thanks.