Post by dixeedeluxe on Sept 13, 2013 7:08:31 GMT -5
Vet told me last night my dog has cancer. The tumor is big and aggressive and on his back. But, it's treatable with surgery if we act fast. He's only 10 and in otherwise great health. No reason not to do the surgery.
DH hates my dogs.
When I told him, he got angry that I was even thinking about $1, 000 for the surgery. What a dick.
The confession is that I had a real "shut the fuck up I make so much more money than you and if you want a say in this, you better step up your income" monent and that's not cool. There are a million better ways to defend it, but that's where my brain went.
I didn't say anything out loud. I just cried because he was being such a selfish asshole.
C25K...it works Seaside 5K...........40:45(2012) Turkey Trot..........41:30(2012)/37:08(2013)/37:40(2014) St Pat's 5K..........39:27(2013)/38:48(2014)/35:12(2015) Belair Town Run......38:09(2013)/36:27(2014) Back To Football 5K..37:36(2013)/43:44(2015) Balt Run Fest 5K.....34:59(2013)/41:50(2014)/35:54(2015)
Vet told me last night my dog has cancer. The tumor is big and aggressive and on his back. But, it's treatable with surgery if we act fast. He's only 10 and in otherwise great health. No reason not to do the surgery.
DH hates my dogs.
When I told him, he got angry that I was even thinking about $1, 000 for the surgery. What a dick.
The confession is that I had a real "shut the fuck up I make so much more money than you and if you want a say in this, you better step up your income" monent and that's not cool. There are a million better ways to defend it, but that's where my brain went.
I didn't say anything out loud. I just cried because he was being such a selfish asshole.
Vet told me last night my dog has cancer. The tumor is big and aggressive and on his back. But, it's treatable with surgery if we act fast. He's only 10 and in otherwise great health. No reason not to do the surgery.
DH hates my dogs.
When I told him, he got angry that I was even thinking about $1, 000 for the surgery. What a dick.
The confession is that I had a real "shut the fuck up I make so much more money than you and if you want a say in this, you better step up your income" monent and that's not cool. There are a million better ways to defend it, but that's where my brain went.
I didn't say anything out loud. I just cried because he was being such a selfish asshole.
Post by rubber pants on Sept 13, 2013 7:13:51 GMT -5
Here's mine:
I get annoyed when someone *updates* a post of theirs and doesnt put the update in the original post at the top. I hate having to scroll through trying to find the update.
Vet told me last night my dog has cancer. The tumor is big and aggressive and on his back. But, it's treatable with surgery if we act fast. He's only 10 and in otherwise great health. No reason not to do the surgery.
DH hates my dogs.
When I told him, he got angry that I was even thinking about $1, 000 for the surgery. What a dick.
The confession is that I had a real "shut the fuck up I make so much more money than you and if you want a say in this, you better step up your income" monent and that's not cool. There are a million better ways to defend it, but that's where my brain went.
I didn't say anything out loud. I just cried because he was being such a selfish asshole.
Wow, I'm sorry. I can totally see where you are coming from.
Vet told me last night my dog has cancer. The tumor is big and aggressive and on his back. But, it's treatable with surgery if we act fast. He's only 10 and in otherwise great health. No reason not to do the surgery.
DH hates my dogs.
When I told him, he got angry that I was even thinking about $1, 000 for the surgery. What a dick.
The confession is that I had a real "shut the fuck up I make so much more money than you and if you want a say in this, you better step up your income" monent and that's not cool. There are a million better ways to defend it, but that's where my brain went.
I didn't say anything out loud. I just cried because he was being such a selfish asshole.
I'm sorry about your dog.
I have the I make more than you moments all the time.
Post by dixeedeluxe on Sept 13, 2013 7:18:52 GMT -5
I'm just so angry that he's separating financial responsibilities ("my dog" not "the" or "our" dog) but combining the incomes that would be used to take care of those responsibilities. It's not fair.
C25K...it works Seaside 5K...........40:45(2012) Turkey Trot..........41:30(2012)/37:08(2013)/37:40(2014) St Pat's 5K..........39:27(2013)/38:48(2014)/35:12(2015) Belair Town Run......38:09(2013)/36:27(2014) Back To Football 5K..37:36(2013)/43:44(2015) Balt Run Fest 5K.....34:59(2013)/41:50(2014)/35:54(2015)
I'm just so angry that he's separating financial responsibilities ("my dog" not "the" or "our" dog) but combining the incomes that would be used to take care of those responsibilities. It's not fair.
So are you not going to have the surgery or is it still up for discussion?
I'm sorry about your dog Dixee sounds like a lot of negative feelings on both sides of the equation. However if my husband ever even thought to voice an opinion about making more money = making more financial decisions for the family then he could take his money and shove it.
I'm just so angry that he's separating financial responsibilities ("my dog" not "the" or "our" dog) but combining the incomes that would be used to take care of those responsibilities. It's not fair.
So are you not going to have the surgery or is it still up for discussion?
Oh he's having it! It's not really up for discussion. I don't think I'm unreasonable in making that call. I talked with the vet about it and he is super awesome and honest and said there's really no reason not to do it.
C25K...it works Seaside 5K...........40:45(2012) Turkey Trot..........41:30(2012)/37:08(2013)/37:40(2014) St Pat's 5K..........39:27(2013)/38:48(2014)/35:12(2015) Belair Town Run......38:09(2013)/36:27(2014) Back To Football 5K..37:36(2013)/43:44(2015) Balt Run Fest 5K.....34:59(2013)/41:50(2014)/35:54(2015)
I have been over analyzing H's interview next week. If they offer him a job the only thing (as of right now) that would keep him from accepting is what kind of benefits they offer (he has to ask next week). I'm kind of freaking out about a potential gap in insurance because we started TTC this cycle so there's a chance I'm pregnant right now. This job has way more pluses so far than minuses and I know how unhappy he is at his current job. From the brief job description they have him Wednesday it sounds like it would even be a m-f, home for dinner kind of job.
I want him to be happy, we could definitely use the pay raise if he gets the offer and yet here I sit still freaking out about the insurance thing and feeling completely selfish (though I have kept my mouth shut because I don't want him to turn down a job because his wife is being neurotic)
Please don't freak out until you have all the information. There are ways to have insurance coverage in between, private insurance or maybe cobra. Even if you had to have a gap, that alone would not be a good reason to turn down an offer, that would make him literally stuck in a job he hates forever. Google private insurance in your state and see what one month would cost, that night ease your fears.
I'm sorry dixeedeluxe. That's really wrong of him to treat the animals as yours. They are part of the family. I hope he comes around and gets on board.
Post by rainbowchip on Sept 13, 2013 7:48:34 GMT -5
I'm pretty sure I don't like my husband anymore. I'm finding out that he lies a lot to other people so he is probably lying to me too. He also never has anything new to say. Like when we are having a conversation, he just keeps saying the same thing over and over and then gets pissed when I want to stop talking about it because its like watching the same 30 seconds of a movie over and over and over.
That being said, I will probably never divorce him so I've been feeling really depressed and stuck.
I'm pretty sure I don't like my husband anymore. I'm finding out that he lies a lot to other people so he is probably lying to me too. He also never has anything new to say. Like when we are having a conversation, he just keeps saying the same thing over and over and then gets pissed when I want to stop talking about it because its like watching the same 30 seconds of a movie over and over and over.
That being said, I will probably never divorce him so I've been feeling really depressed and stuck.
This makes me sad. Do you think you can do couples counseling? It worked wonders for my sisters marriage, ESP with their communication issues.
Post by creamsiclechica on Sept 13, 2013 8:00:42 GMT -5
dixeedeluxe, I'm really sorry about your dog and the negative feelings it brought up for you and your DH. Fingers crossed for a successful surgery. Sorry you're having to go through both things.
rainbowchip, I'm so sorry, that sounds really awful, sad, and not supportive for you. I hate you feel that way. Maybe a big discussion between the two of you, put things out there? Or maybe some individual counseling for you to get your feelings out and feel support?
I want to buy a trampoline for LO. I even found one on CL new in box for $125, sells for $200+ @ Kmart. Only thing is it looks like it is not for adults, holds 250lbs, so maybe. But I want to jump on it it too. Boooo. Now what? Plus I found a john deere plow for LO for $75. I could have Xmas/Bday done with $200 and I got two things I really wanted to for him.
Sometimes I feel weird about being a SAHM because of some of the things I see being said on here...like, "I could NEVER be a SAHM- I would die of boredom," or "I wouldn't feel like my life was complete," or "I feel like I need to contribute more to the world" (these are generalizations, not direct quotes.) It makes me feel weird, because I AM content...I don't feel the need to get a job, I'm not bored...I'm fine- and I feel like maybe I'm weird because of it...like I should be striving to do something else with my life...I don't know- obviously, I'm happy with where I am (even though I have my moments of seriously needing "me time"), but I feel weird about it sometimes because it seems like a lot of people equate SAH to being boring and unfulfilling.
I'm sorry if my post the other day brought up those feelings. I felt awful after about saying I wanted to use my brain because keeping a kid entertained all day obviously requires creative thinking. I meant the book nerd side of my brain.
Sometimes I feel weird about being a SAHM because of some of the things I see being said on here...like, "I could NEVER be a SAHM- I would die of boredom," or "I wouldn't feel like my life was complete," or "I feel like I need to contribute more to the world" (these are generalizations, not direct quotes.) It makes me feel weird, because I AM content...I don't feel the need to get a job, I'm not bored...I'm fine- and I feel like maybe I'm weird because of it...like I should be striving to do something else with my life...I don't know- obviously, I'm happy with where I am (even though I have my moments of seriously needing "me time"), but I feel weird about it sometimes because it seems like a lot of people equate SAH to being boring and unfulfilling.
I think that's awesome you are happy SAH. I go through periods of loving being a working mom, and periods of wishing I was willing to give up the money and SAH. I can't be satisfied! Haha. I would love to have certainty in what I am doing, enjoy that you have that.
Sometimes I feel weird about being a SAHM because of some of the things I see being said on here...like, "I could NEVER be a SAHM- I would die of boredom," or "I wouldn't feel like my life was complete," or "I feel like I need to contribute more to the world" (these are generalizations, not direct quotes.) It makes me feel weird, because I AM content...I don't feel the need to get a job, I'm not bored...I'm fine- and I feel like maybe I'm weird because of it...like I should be striving to do something else with my life...I don't know- obviously, I'm happy with where I am (even though I have my moments of seriously needing "me time"), but I feel weird about it sometimes because it seems like a lot of people equate SAH to being boring and unfulfilling.
That is SO great that being a SAHM makes you happy!! Please don't feel weird about that. I'm definitely one who has said I couldn't be a SAHM FT to just one child. I nearly went crazy this summer when I was off. I'm envious of SAHMs who seem to be so content. I totally thought that would be me and it was really shocking to find that we don't thrive as a family when I am home FT. Working PT is perfect FOR ME and US. You do what works for you!
Sometimes I think I would be a better SAHM to more kids because of the varied schedule and more duties at home. But with just one kid I got restless and we both were bored.
Sometimes I feel weird about being a SAHM because of some of the things I see being said on here...like, "I could NEVER be a SAHM- I would die of boredom," or "I wouldn't feel like my life was complete," or "I feel like I need to contribute more to the world" (these are generalizations, not direct quotes.) It makes me feel weird, because I AM content...I don't feel the need to get a job, I'm not bored...I'm fine- and I feel like maybe I'm weird because of it...like I should be striving to do something else with my life...I don't know- obviously, I'm happy with where I am (even though I have my moments of seriously needing "me time"), but I feel weird about it sometimes because it seems like a lot of people equate SAH to being boring and unfulfilling.
There is nothing wrong or weird about being content with SAH! I also SAH and sometimes I feel the same way as you with the comments but I am so far from bored or unfulfilled. I will be honest I was more bored (as in not doing things I liked so I found it boring) and unfulfilled when I worked full time so I think everybody is just different if what they want out of life.
Sometimes I feel weird about being a SAHM because of some of the things I see being said on here...like, "I could NEVER be a SAHM- I would die of boredom," or "I wouldn't feel like my life was complete," or "I feel like I need to contribute more to the world" (these are generalizations, not direct quotes.) It makes me feel weird, because I AM content...I don't feel the need to get a job, I'm not bored...I'm fine- and I feel like maybe I'm weird because of it...like I should be striving to do something else with my life...I don't know- obviously, I'm happy with where I am (even though I have my moments of seriously needing "me time"), but I feel weird about it sometimes because it seems like a lot of people equate SAH to being boring and unfulfilling.
You are contributing to society! Please don't ever feel that you aren't.
Sometimes I feel weird about being a SAHM because of some of the things I see being said on here...like, "I could NEVER be a SAHM- I would die of boredom," or "I wouldn't feel like my life was complete," or "I feel like I need to contribute more to the world" (these are generalizations, not direct quotes.) It makes me feel weird, because I AM content...I don't feel the need to get a job, I'm not bored...I'm fine- and I feel like maybe I'm weird because of it...like I should be striving to do something else with my life...I don't know- obviously, I'm happy with where I am (even though I have my moments of seriously needing "me time"), but I feel weird about it sometimes because it seems like a lot of people equate SAH to being boring and unfulfilling.
I think that's awesome you are happy SAH. I go through periods of loving being a working mom, and periods of wishing I was willing to give up the money and SAH. I can't be satisfied! Haha. I would love to have certainty in what I am doing, enjoy that you have that.
Sometimes I feel weird about being a SAHM because of some of the things I see being said on here...like, "I could NEVER be a SAHM- I would die of boredom," or "I wouldn't feel like my life was complete," or "I feel like I need to contribute more to the world" (these are generalizations, not direct quotes.) It makes me feel weird, because I AM content...I don't feel the need to get a job, I'm not bored...I'm fine- and I feel like maybe I'm weird because of it...like I should be striving to do something else with my life...I don't know- obviously, I'm happy with where I am (even though I have my moments of seriously needing "me time"), but I feel weird about it sometimes because it seems like a lot of people equate SAH to being boring and unfulfilling.
You are contributing to society! Please don't ever feel that you aren't.
This. You are making a huge contribution to the world... Layne! He's a huge accomplishment. Don't feel weird for being a happy SAHM. I think that is amazing.
@dixee I'm so sorry about your fur baby. That is so wonderful it can be fixed with surgery and I hope it goes smoothly.
rainbowchip I'm so sorry you are feeling this way. Maybe a heart to heart with your H or some therapy might help you get to a better place? You deserve to feel happy. (((Hugs )))