So I'm officially divorced today

[Deleted]

Feeling good. Quick question, I have no intention of changing my last name back to my maiden name, and this seems to surprise a lot of people. Did anyone keep their XH's surname?

I'm just like, too lazy to change everything AGAIN, plus it's O's last name. 

[flex]

I kept ex-dh's until I remarried. I freely admit I kept it mostly just to piss him off. lol

ETA:  I fully intend on keeping DH's last name IF I ever remarry.

[jlt19]

I think a lot of women keep their names if they have kids. I actually don't know anyone that has changed back in that situation.

Glad you're feeling good about it, congrats to a new chapter!

[mrsukyankee]

My mom still has my dad's surname. She might change it when she gets remarried. Maybe.

[knx9211]

We have several family members who didn't change their last names back after divorce. I don't think it's odd and everyone else can keep their opinions to themselves.

Glad you're feeling good. Wishing you luck as you move forward.

[RexManningDay]

Oh shit, I had no idea.

I'm glad you're feeling good.

No experience with the name thing, but I wouldn't rush to change anything either.

[osulori]

I know both FIL's ex wives (MIL and wife #2) kept his last name. MIL for the same reasons as you and wife #2 because she just didn't feel like changing it again (it was her second marriage so I think she was over the name changing business after that). Glad you're feeling good!

[mcsangel2]

I have a friend who has kept her ex's last name, even though they didn't have kids and the ex is now remarried.

[hopecounts]

My mom kept my Dad's last name until she remarried.
It was just easier and her preference.
NBD

[ssmjlm]

I don't think it's weird. I know a lot of people keep it with children so everyone can have the same name type of thing, but whatever works for you.

Now DH's ex-SIL kept BIL's name when they divorced. She remarried a while ago, divorced that guy, and went back to BIL's last name. That was weird to us.

[Deleted]

Ok cool, I'm like the first to divorce that wasn't from a very, very short marriage out of my group of friends so I don't have much IRL to compare. Thanks guys!

[liverandonions]

My mom still has my dad's last name and she'll never remarry. And since both me and my sister are married she doesn't even share a name with us.

Congrats on your new life. Hope it's good to you.

[cleo29]

I had no idea! Glad that you are at peace with everything and onto the next chapter!

I think it is common, especially when children are in the picture, to keep your married name. I don't think there is anything wrong with it.

[greysgirl]

I kept my ex's last name because it's our ds's last name, I think it's pretty common to do that!

[googled]

I think that I would keep my name if I were in your shoes, and for the same reasons.

Glad you're feeling good

[gerberdaisy]

I changed mine as soon as possible. Like was at the DMV first thing when it opened the next day. However, I didn't have any children from that marriage, so its a totally different situation.

You do what works for you. Also, hope you get to do something for yourself today.

[housewife]

I'm keeping STBXH's name. He got mad about it & told be something to the effect of I "don't deserve" his last name lolol. Oh well, dickweed, it's mine now. Although, I have considered changing it entirely to some other last name since I don't particularly care for my maiden name. That seems like a lot of work though.

I'll change it if I remarry.

[vicky]

I have XH's last name legally. The only place I use my maiden name is my personal Facebook.

[Aloe Vera]

My co-worker despises her ex-H as well as his family (I don't know how long they've been married or divorced, she is 64) and she kept his name.

ETA: I don't know why she kept his name. She has 2 sons with her ex-H. She tells this story to people on the phone but doesn't say why she kept it.

[vicky]

Also, big hugs! Get yourself a bottle of wine and cake today!

[sweetchix]

I did not keep my married name. It was a very difficult Polish name and I did not feel it was truly me. I do now, however, have a different last name than DDs, but that doesn't bother me. It also doesn't bother me if someone were to address me as Mrs. XHLastName, I would just correct them.

[brooke77]

Legally, I changed my name back to my maiden name. I have been too lazy to actually change EVERYTHING though. I was only married 5 years so some of my documents/accounts, still had my maiden name on them. I'm getting married and will change my name again.

[mrssandro]

My mother kept hers since she had us kids. No big deal.

[sapphireblue]

I don't think it's weird.

My boyfriend's ex-wife kept his family name after they divorced. They don't have kids or anything but it was her third marriage and she had changed her name every time, and this last name sounds really good with her first name so I think she just figured she'd stick with it!

[vicky]

Jan 17, 2017 13:58:59 GMT -5 flex said:

I kept ex-dh's until I remarried. I freely admit I kept it mostly just to piss him off. lol

ETA:  I fully intend on keeping DH's last name IF I ever remarry.

Oh yeah, I definitely felt like it was a bigger "fuck you" to keep it, especially after he immediately started addressing my things as my maiden name after I moved out.

[dancelnow]

I'm going through this decision myself now. I was firmly in the not changing back camp because it's a pain and I'm established in my field. But my personal email is still my maiden name so it is still visible to people.

Current boyfriend that I do see a future with says he'd be bothered if I kept ex's name if we did get married only because I changed it the first time and he wouldn't want less effort. If I hadn't changed it the first time he said he wouldn't care. That would be a few years off though and in the meantime I'm now thinking of going back as a sign I'm really done with that marriage (family holding out hope I'll change my mind). Just have to figure out how to explain it to DS (6).

[nicbreeful]

My mother has kept hers.

[mrsgoontz]

My mom kept her married name until she remarried. It was much easier this way since her children had the same name. 

You do whatever you want. 

[Deleted]

Best wishes on your new status. And I'd do whatever you want about your name. I don't have the same last name as my kids and it's not really a big deal.

[zoomzoom]

My exSIL kept hers. I think it's more common to keep it than to switch back. Of course, this comes from someone who didn't take her H's name partly b/c it would have been a PITA. I had an aunt take her maiden name back, though. When she remarried, she didn't bother taking her H's name.