Post by cinnamoncox0 on Oct 25, 2016 16:54:21 GMT -5
I'm very sorry your sister and your family are going through this. I hope she heals from this quickly and the bullying is dealt with swiftly. An in law went through this at a similar age (the bullying sent her into psychosis and was inpatient then lived in a residential facility for a few years) and the school totally just brushed it off and the bully's parents pulled the whole not my kid thing and that made things worse for my in law, to see how bad it was for her (the bullying) and then nothing being done about it.
I'm so sorry. 13 is so, so hard. I was 13 the first time I tried. I hope something can be done about the bullies, and I hope she gets the help she needs and knows how much her family loves her.
Post by julianabixby on Oct 25, 2016 18:49:19 GMT -5
I'm so sorry Laz. I don't have any other advice that hasn't been shared, but wanted to say I'll be thinking of your family and sending good thoughts and prayers.
Thank you everyone. It was so good to see her tonight. Lots of therapy and she has started some meds. I can't see her again until Thursday, but she is safe right now.
Post by killercupcake on Oct 25, 2016 20:47:58 GMT -5
I'm sorry you are dealing with this. I meant to respond earlier, but got busy at work and responding on my phone is a PITA.
I'll put on my school counselor hat for a minute...
Let the school know what is going on. When we know about a student who is returning after a hospitalization (of any kind, but it's crucial for psych incidents), we hold a re-entry meeting. We go over safe places and staff/teachers the student trusts to help them in times of crisis. Usually a "pressure pass" is given which allows them access to the counselor at anytime. We do NOT tell teachers exactly what is happening without permission of the student and parent, just that a student is returning after [insert general event], they have a pressure pass and are allowed to visit their counselor as needed. So if you're worried about that, request to keep things a little quiet (unless she wishes it to be known to at least trusted teachers). The school *may* request that a form be completed by your mom and her counselor allowing her counselor to communicate treatment with the school counselor. In my state (and most others), school counselors cannot provide long term counseling, so the outside counseling is necessary, but they are a resource waiting to be used, so make sure to use them.
Since this was due to bullying, our deans office would also get involved. We recently had a law passed that requires investigations to be done anytime an accusation of bullying is made. If it is determined to be true, we typically work to keep those students separate. If it is severe enough, a student may be expelled. This will obviously be different state by state, but be sure to get the admin involved here.
The biggest issue I see after a student is hospitalized after a psychiatric incident is lack of parental follow through. They never get their child to counseling appointments, don't follow up with meds, etc. So I think as long as you guys keep this end of the process up, you should be alright. It'll be hard, but you have to keep at it. Even if she says she doesn't want to go, make her go to counseling. She can sit in silence for the hour (trust me, the counselor is trained to do this, so it won't bother them), but she needs to go.
I'm sorry you are dealing with this. I meant to respond earlier, but got busy at work and responding on my phone is a PITA.
I'll put on my school counselor hat for a minute...
Let the school know what is going on. When we know about a student who is returning after a hospitalization (of any kind, but it's crucial for psych incidents), we hold a re-entry meeting. We go over safe places and staff/teachers the student trusts to help them in times of crisis. Usually a "pressure pass" is given which allows them access to the counselor at anytime. We do NOT tell teachers exactly what is happening without permission of the student and parent, just that a student is returning after [insert general event], they have a pressure pass and are allowed to visit their counselor as needed. So if you're worried about that, request to keep things a little quiet (unless she wishes it to be known to at least trusted teachers). The school *may* request that a form be completed by your mom and her counselor allowing her counselor to communicate treatment with the school counselor. In my state (and most others), school counselors cannot provide long term counseling, so the outside counseling is necessary, but they are a resource waiting to be used, so make sure to use them.
Since this was due to bullying, our deans office would also get involved. We recently had a law passed that requires investigations to be done anytime an accusation of bullying is made. If it is determined to be true, we typically work to keep those students separate. If it is severe enough, a student may be expelled. This will obviously be different state by state, but be sure to get the admin involved here.
The biggest issue I see after a student is hospitalized after a psychiatric incident is lack of parental follow through. They never get their child to counseling appointments, don't follow up with meds, etc. So I think as long as you guys keep this end of the process up, you should be alright. It'll be hard, but you have to keep at it. Even if she says she doesn't want to go, make her go to counseling. She can sit in silence for the hour (trust me, the counselor is trained to do this, so it won't bother them), but she needs to go.
This is really great advice, thank you. I hope they have this at her school. Mom will talk to the school tomorrow - she is going in person to meet with the guidance counselor.
ETA : I assure you there will be follow up. Lots of it. Probably too much. Lol. Between my mom and me we are covering all bases.
I will say, it was sad at the medical facility tonight. I saw some things I can't unsee. Mostly the real young kids. My heart ached for them.
I'm really sorry that you're dealing with this. I went through the same experience with my younger sister 4 years ago and it was so, so hard. Seemed to come out of nowhere, blindsided our family, knowing that we'll always be holding our breath and wondering if she's really ok. Big hugs and prayers coming your way. There's a long road ahead but your sister (& mom) are lucky to have you.
Oh. More importantly. What do we do now? We are talking about changing her school, since the bullies are at this one. They haven't given my mom any guidance. Do we tell the school? Call her doctor? We should call her pediatrician right?
I am so sorry your sister and your family are going through this. My sister attempted suicide at the same age. She was ruthlessly bullied in middle school. My parents sent her to a private high school and it completely changed her life. She still struggles with depression, but has never again been suicidal since she was separated from those bullies. I'll be praying for your sister.