10 yo writing paper about abortion. 2nd update on p. 6

[4speedy]

I got an email yesterday evening from my DD's teacher. DD is in 5th grade. There is an assignment to research and write an opinion paper. This involves stating both sides of an arguement and then proving or disproving either side, depending on DD's stance on the issue. Other kids chose topics related to video gaming, whether schools should mandate homework, etc. DD chose to offer her opinion on abortion. DD will be steered away from discussing abortion as it pertains to rape, incest, etc. I neex to give written permission to the teacher if we decide to let DD pursue this topic.

Just wondering what I may not have considered yet and what other people would do.

UPDATE:

I had spent the better part of today going back and forth on this topic.  Ultimately, I decided that since the can of worms has already been opened, I would allow DD to pursue this topic with guidance rather than her googling on her cousin's cell phone or getting info some other way.  However, just after we got home from school, DD's teacher called.  Several classmates have already informed their parents that DD was writing a paper on abortion so the angry phone calls have started.  (It was not something that was going to be shared with classmates).  The principal has stepped in.  DD is in her bedroom right now trying to come up with a new topic.

[zoomzoom]

Is this something that would be presented to the class or just the teacher? I'm also wondering if the teacher would even approve the topic. It's seems like a pretty mature topic for that age level. And if you have to steer her away from certain aspects of it, she would be missing out on pertinent information related to both sides of the argument.

Grain of salt as I do not have kids.

[revolution]

Who will be reading the paper? Will she have to speak about it or present it to her class? Did you ask her why she chose that topic?

I think the answers to those questions would guide me in my giving approval or not.

[kath16]

Woah. That seems like a very mature subject for a kid that age. Kudos to her for being willing to tackle something so significant, but I honestly don't know if I would allow it. Especially since there would be restrictions.

In fifth grade, have they even had health class yet? SD has it later this school year in 6th grade. I truly cannot tell you what's normal/not normal as far as kids that age knowing about sex, risks, pregnancy, etc. -- By nature of SD's life, she knows more than I would think the average 11 year old -- let alone abortion. I also live in a state that teaches abstinence only.

If it's something she is just turning in as a paper, I would consider allowing it after talking with the teacher. If it's a presentation of any kind, I don't know that I would.

[nessness]

I would lean toward saying no, primarily because of what information she might come across while researching.

[jeaniebueller]

If other kids are writing about things like video games and homework, I would definitely steer her towards a less intense topic.

[miso]

I think it really depends on the kid and the nature of the assignment. If only the teacher will review it, I'd be more inclined to let my child pursue her preferred topic.

If there will be any class discussion, however, I'd probably suggest a different topic. Maybe something like whether or not the Pledge of Allegiance should be mandatory at school or whether people should be forced to stand for the national anthem. Still serious but a tad less heavy.

[chchchia]

Way too young, not only for her but the rest of her classmates, imho. If the other kids are talking video games, I think that is the level to strive for when thinking of this subject. No, just no.

[textbookcase]

Ummm I feel like it's inappropriate subject matter for 10 year olds.

[calle28]

That is a very mature topic. Did you ask her what made her choose it?

[mel]

Honestly, I think she and the audience are MUCH too young for such a topic. This is more appropriate for a high school assignment.

If she has her heart set on something a little more mature (for lack of a better word) than video games and homework, I would steer her in another direction.

[cville]

I'd discuss it with her eyes open and suggest exploring another topic for this project, while working with her to learn more about abortion issues outside of the classroom. Not because she's incapable of articulating a reasoned position on the topic, but because this particular topic has the potential for blowback from classmates, parents, and teachers. And 10 is young enough to not necessarily thoroughly understand that.

I say this as someone who did a 5th grade biography report on Hitler because when I asked my dad to discuss him with me my dad told me I was too young to understand. Squelching curiosity about serious subjects just makes them pop up elsewhere (as I know you know).

[Deleted]

My Mom sat me down in the 3rd grade and was like " Women have babies, but sometimes they can't or don't want to have a baby right then. There is this thing called abortion and it there for a reason. It's always a woman's right to choose whether or not she has a baby."

Then we went to a pro-choice rally.

I might let my kid do this if they didn't have to read the paper in front of the class.

[05heel]

Ten seems awfully young for this. Can she choose something a little more narrow, like when life begins? At least that can be limited to scientific and religious discussions, and she can still pick a "side" after reviewing the evidence.

[onetruething]

Nope.

[onomatopoeia]

Oct 26, 2016 13:13:03 GMT -5 zoomzoom said:

Is this something that would be presented to the class or just the teacher? I'm also wondering if the teacher would even approve the topic. It's seems like a pretty mature topic for that age level. And if you have to steer her away from certain aspects of it, she would be missing out on pertinent information related to both sides of the argument.

Grain of salt as I do not have kids.

This is a good point. 

I would be uncomfortable with this.  I have a 10 yo (boy) and I could not imagine even the most mature of his peers being able to do this. There are other serious topics that I would steer her towards.  

[fivechickens]

Wait...what? Abortion is not an appropriate topic for a 10 year old to write about.

WTH is going on with these schools??

[BaliHai]

Good for her for wanting to tackle this subject, I guess, but I would steer her away. Ten is just really young.

[sonrisa]

Iif she does this as private research project, does she really understand what she would be researching? Do you think she will regret learning details at this young age?

I like the idea of "when does life begin?" Or perhaps teaching sex education in schools?

[mekia]

I feel like we can't shield our kids from controversy and I think it's awesome that your daughter wants to learn more about this. She's also figuring out what she believes in. I would want my kids to learn more about things that interest them.

If this is just for the teacher to read, I would let her do it. I'm not sure if I would let her do this if she needs to present this in front of the class mainly because there's really no "correct" answer to this. And it has the potential to be a painful topic for some (or their parents).

Have you asked your DD why she picked this topic? Has she taken sex education?

[circa1978]

Most grown people can't converse on that topic so I think it would be pretty uncomfortable. Maybe she could research something related, like women's health care and or access to fair health care.

[cjcouple]

No, I have a 10 yo son and I have not even discussed sex to it's 'full extent' yet. Too young!  

ETA: this is based on the fact I assumed this reports were shared with the class. 

[mekia]

If she needs to present this project- I'd have her do something else and explain why.

Then I would answer any questions she has about abortion and even do some research with her.

[gummybear]

Oh jeez. I totally agree that steering her away from rape and incest will be detrimental to the topic. How do you discuss both sides of the abortion argument without tackling rape and incest. They are major factors in so many people's opinions. And I would say that for a college senior writing her thesis on it.

I would not allow my daughter to move forward with this (she's 9). I feel like there are just too many nuances that are not age-appropriate. And, if this is something that is to be presented, I would lose my shit if I found out that a classmate did this at school (and I say this as a pro-choice person) without my prior knowledge and approval.

If she is interested in the topic I would have her research more at home and possibly get her involved in volunteering in some way that is both safe and educational for her and beneficial to the pro-choice/woman's health movement (assuming she is coming down on the side of choice)

[smock]

Ten does sound really young, but girls that young are having abortions, so . . . if the teacher approves, and it doesn't involve a class presentation, I'd probably be okay with it.

[vamoose]

I would tell her that this topic is not appropriate for a school assignment until she is older, but I would definitely explore this further. Ask her if she wants to learn more about abortion. Maybe have a few appropriate resources ready for you two to read together. Offer to answer any and all questions and then follow through on that. I firmly believe that if a kid is old enough to ask the questions, they should get answers (in an age appropriate way).

[whitemerlot]

I would have her research something else.

[Deleted]

Oct 26, 2016 13:56:35 GMT -5 fivechickens said:

Wait...what? Abortion is not an appropriate topic for a 10 year old to write about.

WTH is going on with these schools??

You must have missed the part where OP stated her daughter CHOSE the topic.

[cherryvalance]

Oct 26, 2016 13:56:35 GMT -5 fivechickens said:

Wait...what? Abortion is not an appropriate topic for a 10 year old to write about.

WTH is going on with these schools??

How is this the school's fault?

[twilightmv]

Lurker, but I wrote a pro/con topic on abortion in 6th grade...at a Catholic school. I landed on pro choice. There wasn't much in the way of crazy internet shit in those days, so I'd probably guide my daughter on which sites to use for research. But otherwise I think it's fine.