s/o Why Black Folks Can't Live

[pixy0stix]

May 15, 2018 13:35:14 GMT -5 feva2030 said:

May 15, 2018 13:28:25 GMT -5 lissaholly said:

The logic here is so faulty. The roommate’s scholarship sounds like a better scholarship. If that scholarship was open to the general popolation your god daughter would not have been awarded it, because there are more than two scholarships out there and your god daughter didn’t qualify for a better scholarship against the general population. Scholarships aren’t charity- they are merit based awards- and your god daughter didn’t have the merits. Period.

To the bolded- they should be but they aren't. Period. Now you have pissed me off. My faulty logic? WTF do you know about her merits?  Not that it's any of your head up you own ass business but my goddaughter graduated at the top of her class and is the top 1% of scoring on the ACT and SAT. Would you like to tell me more about how she didn't have the merits.  Bitch please.

Edit to add- she went to shit schools from elementary- high school b/c POOR (and white).

Isn't that around 30,000 kids a year, though? We had 3 from my rural country high school that met all those qualifications. ETA: Out of class of 29.

[feva2030]

May 15, 2018 13:38:51 GMT -5 NewOrleans said:

May 15, 2018 13:35:14 GMT -5 feva2030 said:

To the bolded- they should be but they aren't. Period. Now you have pissed me off. My faulty logic? WTF do you know about her merits?  Not that it's any of your head up you own ass business but my goddaughter graduated at the top of her class and is the top 1% of scoring on the ACT and SAT. Would you like to tell me more about how she didn't have the merits.  Bitch please.

and what the fuck do you know about her roommate's merits, but here you are flapping your mouth about that.  The white girl's merits are off-limits, but the black girl's are not?  

I NEVER questioned her roommates merits. Please show me where I did?

[lissaholly]

May 15, 2018 13:35:14 GMT -5 feva2030 said:

May 15, 2018 13:28:25 GMT -5 lissaholly said:

The logic here is so faulty. The roommate’s scholarship sounds like a better scholarship. If that scholarship was open to the general popolation your god daughter would not have been awarded it, because there are more than two scholarships out there and your god daughter didn’t qualify for a better scholarship against the general population. Scholarships aren’t charity- they are merit based awards- and your god daughter didn’t have the merits. Period.

To the bolded- they should be but they aren't. Period. Now you have pissed me off. My faulty logic? WTF do you know about her merits?  Not that it's any of your head up you own ass business but my goddaughter graduated at the top of her class and is the top 1% of scoring on the ACT and SAT. Would you like to tell me more about how she didn't have the merits.  Bitch please.

Edit to add- she went to shit schools from elementary- high school b/c POOR (and white).

The irony is that taken out of context, this sounds like a sound argument for afirmative action and minority scholatships. (excepting the white bit)

[pixy0stix]

I thought this was a troll at first, but I know plenty of people that really think this way.

[cookiemdough]

May 15, 2018 13:41:36 GMT -5 pixy0stix said:

I thought this was a troll at first, but I know plenty of people that really think this way.

Yes plenty of people think like this. But this person is still here to troll and derail a discussion.

[feva2030]

May 15, 2018 13:40:27 GMT -5 feva2030 said:

I NEVER questioned her roommates merits. Please show me where I did?Edit...Again to the bolded...where do you people get this stuff?  You just make things up to suit the narrative in your head?  I hope I gave the OP some of the perspective (not facts for those of you who are challenged!) she was asking for.  I can't with most of you- Bye.

[Michael Scott]

May 15, 2018 13:40:27 GMT -5 feva2030 said:

May 15, 2018 13:38:51 GMT -5 NewOrleans said:

and what the fuck do you know about her roommate's merits, but here you are flapping your mouth about that.  The white girl's merits are off-limits, but the black girl's are not?  

I NEVER questioned her roommates merits. Please show me where I did?

Can you just admit you don't know shit about affirmative action? 

[seeyalater52]

May 15, 2018 13:40:27 GMT -5 feva2030 said:

May 15, 2018 13:38:51 GMT -5 NewOrleans said:

and what the fuck do you know about her roommate's merits, but here you are flapping your mouth about that.  The white girl's merits are off-limits, but the black girl's are not?  

I NEVER questioned her roommates merits. Please show me where I did?

You keep referencing your relative's merits and saying she should have gotten the scholarship instead of the roommate. The clear implication is that the roommate had less merit to receive the scholarship. 

[pixy0stix]

May 15, 2018 13:43:17 GMT -5 cookiemdough said:

May 15, 2018 13:41:36 GMT -5 pixy0stix said:

I thought this was a troll at first, but I know plenty of people that really think this way.

Yes plenty of people think like this. But this person is still here to troll and derail a discussion.

You're right. Cause now we're talking about the semantics of a fucking scholarship.

[feva2030]

May 15, 2018 13:41:23 GMT -5 lissaholly said:

May 15, 2018 13:35:14 GMT -5 feva2030 said:

To the bolded- they should be but they aren't. Period. Now you have pissed me off. My faulty logic? WTF do you know about her merits?  Not that it's any of your head up you own ass business but my goddaughter graduated at the top of her class and is the top 1% of scoring on the ACT and SAT. Would you like to tell me more about how she didn't have the merits.  Bitch please.

Edit to add- she went to shit schools from elementary- high school b/c POOR (and white).

The irony is that taken out of context, this sounds like a sound argument for afirmative action and minority scholatships. (excepting the white bit)

What? No. Merit based does not equal skin color.

[punisher]

feva, here:

- Your goddaughter could have made use of a scholarship.
- Roommate got a scholarship specifically allotted to a non-white recipient.
- Roommate, by your estimation, didn't "need" the scholarship because her dad is an engineer and she spent the money shopping. (more on that below)
- You're salty because your goddaughter needed a scholarship and you think a black student squandered money your daughter would have put good use to.

Does that sum it up? What are we missing? And would you be willing to pause a moment to imagine how black godparents, parents, and sundry have felt through the years at seeing their daughters and goddaughters miss out on opportunities not because they didn't deserve them but because only white kids could get them?

Empathy much?

Also, for scholarship experts: is it routine for a college to cut a check directly to a student so they have cash, or does the money not to directly to the school? This lower-to-middle-class white girl never got a scholarship either, so I'm curious.

[punisher]

Goddammit. I got sucked in. Sorry, y'all.

Can we say that not crying and deriding a black student for getting a scholarship instead of a white student getting a scholarship is part of the fear and anger about black people not being in the proper context for white folks?

With that, I'll only post to the OP theme from here on out.

[kadams767]

May 15, 2018 13:47:27 GMT -5 punisher said:

feva, here:

- Your goddaughter could have made use of a scholarship.
- Roommate got a scholarship specifically allotted to a non-white recipient.
- Roommate, by your estimation, didn't "need" the scholarship because her dad is an engineer and she spent the money shopping. (more on that below)
- You're salty because your goddaughter needed a scholarship and you think a black student squandered money your daughter would have put good use to.

Does that sum it up? What are we missing? And would you be willing to pause a moment to imagine how black godparents, parents, and sundry have felt through the years at seeing their daughters and goddaughters miss out on opportunities not because they didn't deserve them but because only white kids could get them?

Empathy much?

Also, for scholarship experts: is it routine for a college to cut a check directly to a student so they have cash, or does the money not to directly to the school? This lower-to-middle-class white girl never got a scholarship either, so I'm curious.

Yep, I frequently got checks for the overage from my scholarships/grants/loans once tuition and fees were paid.  I had to use that money for books, room and board, etc.  

[lust2hart]

May 15, 2018 13:47:27 GMT -5 punisher said:

feva, here:

- Your goddaughter could have made use of a scholarship.
- Roommate got a scholarship specifically allotted to a non-white recipient.
- Roommate, by your estimation, didn't "need" the scholarship because her dad is an engineer and she spent the money shopping. (more on that below)
- You're salty because your goddaughter needed a scholarship and you think a black student squandered money your daughter would have put good use to.

Does that sum it up? What are we missing? And would you be willing to pause a moment to imagine how black godparents, parents, and sundry have felt through the years at seeing their daughters and goddaughters miss out on opportunities not because they didn't deserve them but because only white kids could get them?

Empathy much?

Also, for scholarship experts: is it routine for a college to cut a check directly to a student so they have cash, or does the money not to directly to the school? This lower-to-middle-class white girl never got a scholarship either, so I'm curious.

feva2030 I hope you read this post. 

punisher, to answer your question - All funds that come directly "from the school" in terms of a university-wide scholarship, or federal financial aid, or private scholarships that go through the university's endowment association, first go to the school and pay the student's bill directly. Funds that are left over after paying the student's bill will then go to the student. 

When it comes to private scholarships not managed through the school - so like, your church has a scholarship that they'll award - in my experience, most of the time these go directly to the student. But I think it's *possible* for funds to go to the school, but they (the scholarship awarder) would need the student's ID# or whatever to be able to get the funds into the student's account. 

ETA: I should make the caveat that this is how it works at my public university, and I imagine all public universities function this same way although I can't be sure. And I don't have experience with private schools.

[NewOrleans]

May 15, 2018 13:38:06 GMT -5 kadams767 said:

May 15, 2018 13:35:14 GMT -5 feva2030 said:

To the bolded- they should be but they aren't. Period. Now you have pissed me off. My faulty logic? WTF do you know about her merits?  Not that it's any of your head up you own ass business but my goddaughter graduated at the top of her class and is the top 1% of scoring on the ACT and SAT. Would you like to tell me more about how she didn't have the merits.  Bitch please.

If she really had these qualifications and was so concerned about money, she should have picked a school that offered her a full ride and provided a better aid package.  How’s that for bootstraps?  

well, she couldn't because the less qualified black kids got those spots.  

[kadams767]

May 15, 2018 13:52:30 GMT -5 lust2hart said:

May 15, 2018 13:47:27 GMT -5 punisher said:

feva, here:

- Your goddaughter could have made use of a scholarship.
- Roommate got a scholarship specifically allotted to a non-white recipient.
- Roommate, by your estimation, didn't "need" the scholarship because her dad is an engineer and she spent the money shopping. (more on that below)
- You're salty because your goddaughter needed a scholarship and you think a black student squandered money your daughter would have put good use to.

Does that sum it up? What are we missing? And would you be willing to pause a moment to imagine how black godparents, parents, and sundry have felt through the years at seeing their daughters and goddaughters miss out on opportunities not because they didn't deserve them but because only white kids could get them?

Empathy much?

Also, for scholarship experts: is it routine for a college to cut a check directly to a student so they have cash, or does the money not to directly to the school? This lower-to-middle-class white girl never got a scholarship either, so I'm curious.

feva2030 I hope you read this post. 

punisher, to answer your question - All funds that come directly "from the school" in terms of a university-wide scholarship, or federal financial aid, or private scholarships that go through the university's endowment association, first go to the school and pay the student's bill directly. Funds that are left over after paying the student's bill will then go to the student. 

When it comes to private scholarships not managed through the school - so like, your church has a scholarship that they'll award - in my experience, most of the time these go directly to the student. But I think it's *possible* for funds to go to the school, but they (the scholarship awarder) would need the student's ID# or whatever to be able to get the funds into the student's account. 

ETA: I should make the caveat that this is how it works at my public university, and I imagine all public universities function this same way although I can't be sure. And I don't have experience with private schools.

This is right, in my experience.  I administer a private scholarship and we send the funds directly to the school for disbursement on my recipients’ accounts.  We will not send a check directly to the student, but it is fairly easy to coordinate with the student and school to have it run through the school’s financial aid/bursar’s office, especially since the kids really need this money.  They do everything they can to make it happen.  

[irishbride2]

There are thousands of scholarships that are limited to specific parameters.

Heck, I didn't need a scholarship at all and I qualified for several. I earned them for various merit reasons. Should I have turned down my merit scholarships simply because my parents could afford it?

The issue is that people fixate on POC. I highly doubt any of my college roommates talk about how the upper-class white chick unfairly got a scholarship that they didn't. But when it's a POC, they are scrutinized for fairness.

[punisher]

May 15, 2018 13:58:59 GMT -5 irishbride2 said:

There are thousands of scholarships that are limited to specific parameters.

Heck, I didn't need a scholarship at all and I qualified for several. I earned them for various merit reasons. Should I have turned down my merit scholarships simply because my parents could afford it?

The issue is that people fixate on POC. I highly doubt any of my college roommates talk about how the upper-class white chick unfairly got a scholarship that they didn't. But when it's a POC, they are scrutinized for fairness.

Or for sleeping in the common room.

[foundmylazybum]

Honestly I think that Feva is a jerk, but in some respects she gave an honest answer to Nita's question as to WHY and Where white people are getting these ideas. It seems like she (and as Pixy pointed out lots of other people believe too, b/c I've heard a similar belief), that black people are "taking" something away from white people.

The methods are different. Neighborhoods! Starbucks! Golf Courses! Schools! Scholarships ::eye roll: BBQs.

The belief is almost always the same "MINE!" or almost.."Get off my lawn! I can't LOSE this!" but the way it actually manifests itself is in different ways.

The reality of the situation is often different as evidenced from the above conversation but getting people to actually see the truth is pretty hard.

Facts are challenging right Feva?

[Michelle]

I wonder if Feva is mad that I got 2 scholarships for $500 from my mom's employer to cover books? You have to be the kid of an employee. And most of the employees are white. So chances are, you are going to be white in order to qualify for that scholarship.

There are thousands of scholarships like that. Is Feva all worked up over those too? If not, she should be.

[pixy0stix]

This entire argument is stupid anyway. Instead of asking, “How can *all* qualified kids get a college education?” we’re left with bleating about affirmative action and a poor white girl who could if not for “unfair” scholarships.

Round and round we go on this racist merry-go-round.

[NewOrleans]

May 15, 2018 13:40:27 GMT -5 feva2030 said:

May 15, 2018 13:38:51 GMT -5 NewOrleans said:

and what the fuck do you know about her roommate's merits, but here you are flapping your mouth about that.  The white girl's merits are off-limits, but the black girl's are not?  

I NEVER questioned her roommates merits. Please show me where I did?

well, there's the initial post about affirmative action where you assumed that black students were less qualified applicants (poor grades and scores and whatnot) because you think that's how affirmative action works.
Then there was the part where you said the godchild was working hard and the other was shopping (aka not working hard).
Then you seemed to assume she would have a lower GPA than godchild because she only needed a 2.whatever for her scholarship.

I know, I know.  You're not racist because your GD's roommate has a black friend whom she totally adores but shittalks behind her back.

[bohemianmango]

In general, our country’s educational system puts people of color and of lower socioeconomic status at a disadvantage. The resentment towards people of color for seeking and using their available opportunities is part of the racism problem. The opportunities are not always going to be equal in quantity, quality or expectations. It’s unfair to expect so. It’s great that your goddaughter is working hard to move forward. Her roommate’s scholarship for Black people was not taking anything away from her. I hope your goddaughter finds more opportunities to continue on her path with success and keeps her friendship without any resentment.

From what I can tell, the original intent of this post was asking why your goddaughter would be able to walk around and enjoy life more freely without fear of the police being called or having guns drawn on her based on color of skin, in contrast to the experience of her roommate. When people are calling the police, they don’t care about gpa, contribution to society, or anything else. Their judgment is based on appearance alone.

[NewOrleans]

May 15, 2018 13:45:41 GMT -5 feva2030 said:

May 15, 2018 13:41:23 GMT -5 lissaholly said:

The irony is that taken out of context, this sounds like a sound argument for afirmative action and minority scholatships. (excepting the white bit)

What? No. Merit based does not equal skin color.

She didn't get the scholarship for being black.  She got the scholarship for her merits, chosen from among black applicants.  Why is this so hard to understand for you?  

[SwimDeep]

punisher - I have a personal anecdote that might help. I received two different scholarships during college. One was state sponsored (the GA Hope scholarship). That one was paid directly to the school to cover tuition. I received a small stipend to cover part of the cost of books. The private scholarship I received was paid directly to me via check that I deposited in my bank account and was able to use to cover whatever expenses I needed to cover. Since I commuted, I used it for gas (and books...I always needed money for books).

To join in the actual conversation, I remember a lot of coded language growing up. And I'm still around a lot of coded language right now. I hate it, and I call people out on it the best I can...I've actually considered divorcing my husband over it :/ I had the opportunity to get out of my family's bubble and travel abroad when I was 21. Ever since then I've been more sensitive to the way my family talks about people of different nationalities/races. I'm open with my scorn for their racist views and they're open with their scorn for my "liberal" ways.
...which is why I hang out here...with people who like to think

Now, do I get a catch in my stomach when a black man walks by? Yes, but it has nothing to do with the color of his skin and everything to do with his gender. Males are threats. I will always have my guard up when I'm around men. I get the same exact feeling when I white man walks by.

[feva2030]

May 15, 2018 13:47:27 GMT -5 punisher said:

feva, here:

- Your goddaughter could have made use of a scholarship.
- Roommate got a scholarship specifically allotted to a non-white recipient.
- Roommate, by your estimation, didn't "need" the scholarship because her dad is an engineer and she spent the money shopping. (more on that below)
- You're salty because your goddaughter needed a scholarship and you think a black student squandered money your daughter would have put good use to.

Does that sum it up? What are we missing? And would you be willing to pause a moment to imagine how black godparents, parents, and sundry have felt through the years at seeing their daughters and goddaughters miss out on opportunities not because they didn't deserve them but because only white kids could get them?

Empathy much?

Also, for scholarship experts: is it routine for a college to cut a check directly to a student so they have cash, or does the money not to directly to the school? This lower-to-middle-class white girl never got a scholarship either, so I'm curious.

I said I was done but reading the bolded I just can't.  She made use of the best scholarship offered to her, the best scholarships available were not available to her because she is white. PERIOD.  She has worked her butt off and has been through some horrific experiences.  Empathy much? Oh..no because she's white. White tears and all.  got it.

[claudiajean]

It’s irritating though that another thread where we could be exploring our hidden or subconscious biases is instead being derailed by blatant racism. It makes it to easy to be self-congratulatory “at least I’m not like that!” (Not that anyone is being that way at the moment, but it’s something that seems to happen when threads go like this.)

[feva2030]

May 15, 2018 14:00:57 GMT -5 foundmylazybum said:

Honestly I think that Feva is a jerk, but in some respects she gave an honest answer to Nita's question as to WHY and Where white people are getting these ideas. It seems like she (and as Pixy pointed out lots of other people believe too, b/c I've heard a similar belief), that black people are "taking" something away from white people.

The methods are different. Neighborhoods! Starbucks! Golf Courses! Schools! Scholarships ::eye roll: BBQs.

The belief is almost always the same "MINE!" or almost.."Get off my lawn! I can't LOSE this!" but the way it actually manifests itself is in different ways.

The reality of the situation is often different as evidenced from the above conversation but getting people to actually see the truth is pretty hard.

Facts are challenging right Feva?

This is what I was trying to do until some of you got my blood pressure up.

Edit to add...the white BBQ lady is a fool and deserves all the mess she has coming to her.  Facts aren't challenging to me it just cracks me up (and irritates me to no end) when liberal fools try to make them up.

[feva2030]

May 15, 2018 14:06:28 GMT -5 NewOrleans said:

May 15, 2018 13:45:41 GMT -5 feva2030 said:

What? No. Merit based does not equal skin color.

She didn't get the scholarship for being black.  She got the scholarship for her merits, chosen from among black applicants.  Why is this so hard to understand for you?  

She got the scholarship because she was black. Why is that so hard for you to understand?

[NitaX]

May 15, 2018 12:43:47 GMT -5 feva2030 said:

May 15, 2018 11:06:58 GMT -5 NitaX said:

So, are we trolling or are you going to actually add a lil something to the convo here? As the creator of this thread, I did not intend for it to be one of open hostility or trolling. It's one for dialogue.

Now, either you can have some stats or you can say "this is anecdotal because it happened to me."

But, I'm not interested in having this thread derailed with Foolishness. 

No absolutely not trolling. You asked for explanations and I'm just offering up what I have observed.  I'm certainly not trying to derail such an important conversation.  As far as an anecdote, I could offer several but one sticks out in my mind the most.  My (white) goddaughter came from absolute poverty, she was the first in her family to go to college.  She was on a partial scholarship that she had to maintain a 3.75 to keep.  Her black roommate (who she adores- they are still friends) had a full ride that she only had to maintain a 2.5 to keep (specific minority scholarship- white people not eligible.)  My goddaughter had to photocopy classmates textbooks because she could not afford her own.  The $ she made from her job at a sub shop went to pay for her housing.  She is still paying off student loans.  Her black friend/roommate got her scholarship check and went shopping because her engineer father had already paid for her books.  I'm not defending either position- I was just offering perspective as to why.

So - you're mad at whom? The black student because University set the guidelines for maintaining the scholarship? Are you also assuming that said black student only did the bare minimum to maintain said scholarship?

Also in this - are you also mad that the black student had a well to do father? Because the layers to this discussion of privilege here are worth further discussion.

Also, as someone who works in higher ed and JUST finished a scholarship cycle - donors set the requirements for scholarships along with the University standards - which could be dictated also by a governing board. My unit has several scholarships for "underrepresented" student populations as well as students who have financial needs. In creating those scholarships, donors in particular seek to be a benefit to kids who were just like them in many aspects. Be that background, race, class, etc. Now, these cannot be discriminatory, but often the donor sees it as a way to help a student because he or she could not have gotten a degree without assistance. Or better yet - they had parents who never completed school because of family obligations.

Just throwing that in here because - this thread sounds like you have a lot of animosity for someone like myself who went to college on a scholarship for minority students. Like, was I not supposed to have that opportunity?