silva, awesome to all of that, except the heartbreak.
My BFF (male friend) in college and I decided to stop the friend thing and have sex one night. We were doing it doggystyle (because I'm a refined gentlewoman) and he suddenly stopped. I was like, 'Whyy?' At the time, he said he felt ill from drinking/eating too much (to be fair, it was around the holiday and we killed a Hickory Farms basket and drank rum and Coke). But, he seemed weirded out. Years later, while we were enjoying wine at a restaurant (he was meeting my soon-to-be H, who had just gone to the restroom), I asked him why he stopped, it seemed like there was more. He leans in and he goes, 'I didn't want to say anything, but you had a serious crop of ass hair and I lost my erection.' And, like, right then H walked back to the table. We were dying. DY-ING. Could not say anything. It was one of those, the food came, and you'd snort suddenly into your soup. Awful meal. Just awful. I told him when I hugged him that I was going home and shaving my ass crack and he said, 'You go, girl' BFFs for life.
And he didn't tell you until years later? What kind of a friend turned one night stand is he?
Seriously, who knows anything at nineteen. I thought I knew it all. I really did. I was at my most-stupid. Also, I feel that bamker would have funny stories, or ltp, or anyone, because these are all tame. What about GOZF, she seems interesting.
Code fail.
You rang?
I've done some really strange, ill-advised stuff. Most of which I'm not talking about.
There was the dude whose apartment I was at (because my friend wanted to bang his friend, and I got dragged along) who had just had dental surgery and was drooling and lisping, who jumped out from the other room, naked except for a Mexican wrestling mask. I did not have sex with him. He actually thought the mask would up his chances.
There was the dude who straight-up looked like Stephen King. We had sex in the bathroom (klassy!), and then he took me home, insisted on putting me in pajamas, then left after stealing a bottle of whiskey and a pack of smokes.
Seriously, who knows anything at nineteen. I thought I knew it all. I really did. I was at my most-stupid. Also, I feel that bamker would have funny stories, or ltp, or anyone, because these are all tame. What about GOZF, she seems interesting.
Code fail.
I've done some really strange, ill-advised stuff. Most of which I'm not talking about.
This is where I'm at. I'll pull out the on-the-surface college stories, but there are some not ready for prime time tales I'm keeping to myself
lmao. gozf he stole your whisky and cigs? Was he any good at the sex?
I have little recollection of the actual sex. The whole time I was thinking, "I am so glad he's behind me, because this dude looks like Stephen King," and while I found that hilarious, I really didn't find it sexy, y'know?
The real Stephen King would have never stolen from me. Fake Stephen King was the worst.
I have little recollection of the actual sex. The whole time I was thinking, "I am so glad he's behind me, because this dude looks like Stephen King," and while I found that hilarious, I really didn't find it sexy, y'know?
The real Stephen King would have never stolen from me. Fake Stephen King was the worst.
I once made out with a guy solely because he sounded like Christian Slater.
When I worked at Goodwill in college this guy walked in and he was a doppleganger for Tom Delonge. I damn near fainted. I dated him for like 6 months but broke it off because he was terrible at the sex. My god he was hot though.
There was the guy who had all these tattoos. Like, of what bones were under his skin. It was like fucking Slim Goodbody. Which is something I wanted to do as a kid. Not really fuck him, but I loved that show, and I wanted to be his girlfriend. Imagine my delight when I met this bone tattoo dude!
Post by karinothing on Oct 18, 2013 12:59:00 GMT -5
I have confessed this on MM before but
Once I was driving down the street. The guy in the car next to me was super hot. We were flirting as we drove along the road. I motioned to him and we pulled off on a side street and made out on the hood of my car.
I once made out with a guy solely because he sounded like Christian Slater.
When I worked at Goodwill in college this guy walked in and he was a doppleganger for Tom Delonge. I damn near fainted. I dated him for like 6 months but broke it off because he was terrible at the sex. My god he was hot though.
See, if he looked like Mark Hoppus he would've been good at it!
There was the guy who had all these tattoos. Like, of what bones were under his skin. It was like fucking Slim Goodbody. Which is something I wanted to do as a kid. Not really fuck him, but I loved that show, and I wanted to be his girlfriend. Imagine my delight when I met this bone tattoo dude!
Living the dream, guys. Living the dream.
omg
That guy was riveting.
When I was a kid in the grocery store with my mom and little old ladies would ask me what my name was, I'd lie and tell them it was Lois. Because Lois was Slim Goodbody's friend on the show.
This was the beginning of a lifetime of me absolutely humiliating my poor mother. "Her name is NOT Lois," she'd say, all flustered.
In college, when I was 19, my boyfriend broke up with me. I was immature and mad that he broke up with me before I broke up with him. Well, three of his friends got wind of it and I guess they weren't really his friends because they started blowing up my phone and wanting to hang out. I made out with one in a closet with my ex in the next room, I made out with the other at a party and I screwed the third one. And then it caused a huge thing between the ex and his "bros". I was a lot hotter and thinner back then. No one would ever fight over me today. Sigh. Lol!
Once I was driving down the street. The guy in the car next to me was super hot. We were flirting as we drove along the road. I motioned to him and we pulled off on a side street and made out on the hood of my car.
I remember you mentioning it before but it is still amazing!
Oh, I don't know if this is scandalous or smart. I was friends with a guy in college who had a hot roommate, D. D and I became friends and hung out casually a few times. One night we were hammered and I got really excited because he was hot and I knew we were going to hook up. It was terrible. TERRIBLE. Ugh, I was so sad. Even drunk, I was like "Um, no." So, I told him to leave my apartment at 3 in the morning because this just wasn't going anywhere. He was drunk and couldn't drive, so had to call around to have someone come pick him up. Lol! We were still friends after that. He tried one more time to hook up with me a few months later and I told him no way.
Post by retardy4thaparty on Oct 18, 2013 13:11:55 GMT -5
The Chippendales were in town at a local casino. After their show a couple of them were drinking in the hotel bar. My girlfriend and I started talking to them. That night, I hooked up with one of them in the same bed my friend was passed out in. He left his watch which I now keep as a trophy. I was so proud of myself that night!
Post by cuddlyevil on Oct 18, 2013 13:13:38 GMT -5
I used to write erotic stories with a guy friend while we were at work (we didn't work together). This was a long time ago. We spent one night together and it was amazing, we were both walking funny the next day.
I had sex in the back of a lincoln continental outside my favorite bar. The guy and I left the bar, all of our friends walked right past the car and had no idea we were in there. It was awesome. We became FWB for a little while, the night we drank 3 bottles of wine while hanging out in his parents jacuzzi was pretty awesome.
I had a guy in college who neither one of us would call each other before 1am. He was a cart guy at a country club and I was a bartender. The only time we conversed before 1am was the one time we had sex at work in the cart garage.
He was so damn hot. His name in my phone was fuck buddy. Mine in his too.
H was at a conference and I went up mid week to visit him and stay the night at his hotel room. We went to a strip club.
We chatted up one of the dancers who later got in trouble for smacking the ass of another dancer. Apparently that club was too classy for that.
As we were walking out to catch a cab, this dancer was hauling her suitcase down the stairs, yelling at the manager who had kicked her out. We asked her if she needed a ride.
She came back to our place and we had a fabulous threesome before she left around 6 am because she was stripping her way down the east coast in order to get to Florida the next week.
Post by underwaterrhymes on Oct 18, 2013 13:28:26 GMT -5
I'll share one I'm not proud of.
A guy friend (and former roommate of mine) and I went to a concert out of state together. There was originally going to be a larger group of us, but everyone else bailed, so it was just the two of us.
When we got there, he told me that he planned on getting me drunk and touching my boobs my the end of the night. I laughed. Because he was engaged and I really thought he was kidding.
I did get drunk and later that night he told me that he fantasized about me all the time and wanted to masturbate together.
I kept telling him I thought it was a bad idea, but he was very flattering and persistent and eventually I gave in. We didn't have sex, but we did touch one another.
It's something I feel horrible about. We never talked about it again. Eventually he got married and then later divorced. He's married to someone else now, who is a sweetheart.