Tomorrow's my 30 week appointment with the midwives. At every appointment since like 16 weeks they've scolded me for gaining too much weight and I'm not kidding when I say that it's giving me anxiety. They usually ask me what I ate the day before and then tell me to stop eating carbs and to remember that I only NEED protein and veg. Carbs are a want. I think that's bullshit. Cookies are a want (and to be honest, I want a lot). Carbs are like my thing. You've taken away wine, you can't have my freaking WHOLE WHEAT pasta and toast. I do my own weigh-ins, so I shaved a pound or two off my weight at my 28 week appointment. That put me at 20 pounds gained total. I still got yelled at! "We like to see patients gain no more than 30 pounds and with the holidays you are definitely pushing it." So it's like they've made up these arbitrary guidelines that I have to abide by, wtf.
I gained 40 lbs in my first pregnancy and birthed a perfectly healthy 7 1/2 pound kid. No complications, no complaints from my old midwife group. My coworker is 28 weeks pregnant and has gained about the same weight and her doctor hasn't said a word. I weighed this morning and now I'm up 25 pounds. Anyway, I'm going to keep lying about my weight at my appointments. Fuck them.
Sorry this is a boring food/weight flameful, but I'm seriously losing my mind about it lol.
Post by onomatopoeia on Dec 9, 2014 9:33:00 GMT -5
This is not flameful at all, unless you mean that we should flame the shit out of your midwives. I am not a doctor, but 20 pounds at 30 weeks does not seem unhealthy to me. At all.
There's this guy at my job who is super cute. He's a baby though, like 21. He's always flirting with me and I'm sure everybody else. I feel like a creeper though since I have almost 8 years on him but whatever it's fun! It's not serious flirting, so all good.
This is not at all flameful to me. I'm sorry they're giving you anxiety when they discuss your weight. Perhaps you could mention that to them? It seems the anxiety would not be good for you or the baby.
Unless you have GD, I don't see why they would say you need to limit carbs. The books I read during pregnancy said to eat a balanced diet including carbs.
“Life is not orderly. No matter how we try to make it so, right in the middle of it lose a leg, fall in love, drop a jar of applesauce.” - Natalie Goldberg
With ten more weeks to go (during which you really ought to be gaining the lion's share of pregnancy weight gain), I don't think its unreasonable for a doctor to say that you should be cautious. I gained over 50 lbs and probably could have used a talking to, although my doc never said anything.
But eliminating food groups? Is not good advice. And obviously the manner the staff is going about lecturing you is not effective and is upsetting you, which is terrible.
KOKO. You've done this before and you know what you are doing.
I thought maybe lying to them to avoid getting yelled at might be flameful. It is definitely chickenshit, ha.
I don't think there's an office manager with any authority. I really should just tell them that they're getting under my skin.
I get that gaining 30 pounds is healthy, and sure I'd love to stick to 30 pounds. But it's not looking like that's going to happen. I just thought the range was 25-35 pounds, so I didn't think I was that far off and am surprised how intense they are about it.
Fuuuuuck that. Not flamefull at all! I gained 35-40 with both my kids and my dr never said shit. My girlfriend gained 70+ with her daughter and she didn't even really change her eating habits, the weight just stuck on. Your body does what it does during pregnancy, getting all worried about your weight to the point where its giving you anxiety isn't good for anyone. Your doctor is a douche.
I got my birthday gift from my MIL yesterday. I don't know why it surprises me every year but after 16 years, you would think she would know me enough to buy something more personal instead of another Christmas knickknack. I realize I sound ungrateful thus the flameful confession.
Not flameful. Who wants another Christmas knickknack that someone else picked out for them. No.
I would just tell them their focus on your weight is giving you anxiety. Sure it is their job to teach you about this stuff and I see nothing wrong with them mentioning it and giving you guidelines. But as the patient you also have the right to tell them when you are feeling uncomfortable.
My doctor said "I want you to gain 10-15lbs" and I literally (albeit involuntarily) snorted and said "Okay, I'll do my best." I gained 30 total, and they never breathed a word about it because everything was great - I had no complications and L was perfectly healthy.
In your shoes, I'd either snap at them or I'd lie to them, as well. As long as you are making generally good food choices, which I'm sure you are, the rest is pretty much out of your control - which the midwives should know.
Same here intentionalsnarkshark, it's been a tough month for us, I think we have like $7 left at the moment but at least I get paid tonight at midnight.
I wouldn't lie, just because I'd be afraid it would come back to bite me later. (I know I packed on a lot of water weight the last few weeks...if you do have complications later on with swelling + protein or sugar in your urine or something, you don't want them to double-check your weight and then have to admit you were lying, lol.) I would be ticked at the constant weight talking-tos. I gained at least 40 lbs (and I am not small) and it all fell off within a few weeks. Your body does what it does, to a point.
There's this guy at my job who is super cute. He's a baby though, like 21. He's always flirting with me and I'm sure everybody else. I feel like a creeper though since I have almost 8 years on him but whatever it's fun! It's not serious flirting, so all good.
I could have written this in these exact words once upon a time (like 15 years ago!).
Um, we jut celebrated our 9th wedding anniversary last week
Post by cheeseandcrackers on Dec 9, 2014 9:53:14 GMT -5
Oh wow, they sound annoying. I don't know your starting weight, but I am pretty sure I already gained 20 pounds and they haven't scolded me for it... yet.
My doc was a dick about weight gain too. And at my 33 week appointment he told me he was concerned because I hadn't gained any weight since my 29 week appointment. Make up you mind, jerk.
Another one looking forward to DHs payday at midnight.
I have no clue how much weight I gained. I would step on the scale and look away. The doctors were nice but the nurses were being assholes. I gained weight after being in Disney for a week and walking god knows how many miles. The nurse said "well all that walking doesn't help if you're walking around eating ice cream!" they gave me anxiety too so once I was diagnosed with GD, I started looking away when I got on the scale.
Fuck them. I really think that your body gains what it gains as long as your eating right and otherwise healthy they should really stfu about it. I understand why they worry about it but I just don't understand the practices that go about it in this manner. FTR I was told no more than 15lbs by my doc at my first appointment. He spoke to me once when I gained 7lbs in a month and all he said was "watch out but it will probably even out" the next month I gained 0 lbs. Also, at the end the week that I survived on almost nothing but fro yo with all the toppings I lost 4 lbs. I obviously don't think lying to your doctor is good but I totally get why you are doing it.
My flameful is fitting considering the weight topic though I am not pregnant. A coworker brought in pastries from Whole Foods. I ate a huge one even though I stopped for DD on my way and got a donut because WF pastries are soooo good. I am now considering eating my donut in addition to the almond pastry that was the size of my head.
I wouldn't lie, just because I'd be afraid it would come back to bite me later. (I know I packed on a lot of water weight the last few weeks...if you do have complications later on with swelling + protein or sugar in your urine or something, you don't want them to double-check your weight and then have to admit you were lying, lol.) I would be ticked at the constant weight talking-tos. I gained at least 40 lbs (and I am not small) and it all fell off within a few weeks. Your body does what it does, to a point.
LOL. That's a good point. Though if I tell the truth tomorrow, it will look like I gained 5 pounds in 2 weeks.
I will say that, aside from their intense focus on weight gain, they are an awesome group. I'm just surprised there aren't more pregnants having weight-related breakdowns in the waiting room.
I just had my first appointment and they told me I was only recccomended to gain 15 pounds the entire pregnancy due to my BMI. I, of course, googled this and every other legit source says the reccomended range is 15-25 so whatever. I didn't gain any weight my first pregnancy but I started out pretty bloated from IVF so I lost and then regained those 10 pounds. On the other hand, my sister had two large babies so they told her no carbs all pregnancy. I would die.
Huh? You've gained 20 pounds and they're on your back about it?
My doctor told me to gain no more than 25 and I am tiny! 25 pounds is a large percentage of my body weight. And at 30 weeks, it doesn't seem like you would gain much more than another 10 pounds.
There's this guy at my job who is super cute. He's a baby though, like 21. He's always flirting with me and I'm sure everybody else. I feel like a creeper though since I have almost 8 years on him but whatever it's fun! It's not serious flirting, so all good.
I could have written this in these exact words once upon a time (like 15 years ago!).
Um, we jut celebrated our 9th wedding anniversary last week
Oh gosh, that's so funny lol congrats! Won't be me though.
Another one looking forward to DHs payday at midnight.
I have no clue how much weight I gained. I would step on the scale and look away. The doctors were nice but the nurses were being assholes. I gained weight after being in Disney for a week and walking god knows how many miles. The nurse said "well all that walking doesn't help if you're walking around eating ice cream!" they gave me anxiety too so once I was diagnosed with GD, I started looking away when I got on the scale.
WTH! That's so not cool, nurses. It's like seriously, can we try not to be an a-hole?