Do you think you'd remarry?

[lust2hart]

Talking with some friends last night, we were asked, "What is one thing you won't ever do again?" and one of them said, "Get married." And I was like, "Ooooo, me too." But another friend was like, "Really? I LOVE being married and would absolutely want to be married again if something happens to H or we get divorced." 

So - If your marriage ends for whatever reason, do you think you'd remarry? 

Options:
Yes
No but would be in a longterm/committed relationship
Would not take on another committed relationship but would have fun dating every now and then
No, I'd prefer to just be alone
SS

[mrsukyankee]

Yes, but only if it was a good option. I've always been perfectly happy to not be married (even before I met my H). So, I'd date and enjoy life, and if I met someone, cool. If not, also cool.

[starburst604]

LOLZ. Hard pass.

ETA: this is not to say I wouldn't be open to a relationship that came about organically at some point in time, but if my marriage doesn't make it now, finding a replacement partner isn't remotely on my radar. The idea of going back to online dating (how I met H 12 years ago) makes me physically cringe, I can't see me ever doing that again. If I did someday commit to a relationship, I doubt I'd want to marry or even live together. But maybe I'm just traumatized right now, who knows. 

[gretchenindisguise]

Nope. I think about this relatively frequently and its been trending on fb about how marriages in the US for many tend to make lives easier for males and less so for females.

I just don’t think I need it in my future.

[cmeon]

Definitely goats.

[glw]

I'd definitely remarry. (Don't tell MH this lol)

[rupertpenny]

I'm separated and leaning towards no, but maybe? I do know that I will never have fully joint finances again, and I don't love the idea of living with another adult full-time. I don't want to birth any more babies, either. But of course, never say never. I am less likely to ever have another wedding.

[deadwing]

I'm very happily single after my divorce. I have no interest in dating at this point in my life. Even IF I find myself in a relationship in the future, I have no interest in getting married again. Life is good with me and my pets.

I could see some appeal to a "Golden Girls" type of living arrangement in my later years.

[plutosmoon]

I got divorced in late 2020, I'm just now considering dating again. I don't plan to ever marry or move in with anyone. I might consider a boyfriend, but he can stay in his own house.

[gummybear]

Definitely not. I might be open to stumbling upon a partner in an organic fashion (not through dating) but I’d much rather be alone.

[maudefindlay]

Feb 9, 2024 11:04:45 GMT -5 gretchenindisguise said:

Nope. I think about this relatively frequently and its been trending on fb about how marriages in the US for many tend to make lives easier for males and less so for females.

I just don’t think I need it in my future.

After my Grandpa died many years ago, someone asked my late Grandma if she'd remarry or even date and she said "Yuck! What would I want with some old man? He'd just get sick and I'd have to take care of him." Ftr she and Grandpa had a wonderful marriage of over 50 years, she just wasn't going to do it again at that age. She then followed it up "Don't think there haven't already been old men sniffing around me either, ugh."

[sugarbear1]

I divorced three years ago and thought I would never want to be married again. Even still, I don't feel like I ever *need* to be married again. I am so much happier now.

That said, I've found myself in a long term relationship with someone I love and can see myself with for life. He definitely does not want to get married again, mostly because of his really awful divorce.

I would marry him in a heartbeat, if it was something he truly wanted. ETA: but would not marry until my children are out of the house. They have a great dad and both are doing well. I don't want to go through blending a family.

[marvine]

I don't think so. I love my husband, but I don't want another one. (I guess you never know, but thinking about it today, if something were to happen to him, I'd be content to not remarry or date.)

[jamaicam]

I liked being married and had a good marriage so I have positive associations with it. So I would theoretically like to be married again.

However, my partner and I have been together for 5 years now. And haven't got married. Not because the relationship isn't strong enough or right, but because I am actually happy the way things are. And there are practical reasons too - I don't want to give up any rights to my assets (which were left by my H for our kids) if anything happened (and yes I know he could have rights if we split up now but I have spoken to lawyers to protect ourselves). Also, with my salary alone, the boys would get some good financial support for colleges - with his added in, it wouldn't be as good.

[bears]

After my grandmother became a widow, aunt asked her if she would ever want another husband. Her response was, "why would I want one of those?"

I love my husband, but I feel that answer in my bones.

[W.T.Faulkner]

My kids are small and I don't want more, so I can't even imagine wanting to date at this point in my life.

Maybe when they're older and more independent, I would want to try dating. But now? No way.

[yaga]

Yes and I did. I got divorced when I was 33, no kids. I knew I absolutely wanted to get married again, even though I was finally decided on not having kids.

And I did! And I probably would again, or at the very least be in a committed relationship. I like companionship and having a supportive partner. I didn't the first time and having it now is so, so nice. I'm also prefectly content doing things alone (which I did a lot in the year I was single between my divorce and meeting my now H), but I feel like at times I need someone else to like, encourage me to leave the house.

[starburst604]

deadwing, me and my closest friends have for many years talked about a Golden Girls type of living arrangement in our late years. With lots of cats. I feel ready to start that life tomorrow!

[basilosaurus]

For personal gain, like visa or money, quite possibly. But for love? Nah. But I never wanted that ever anyway and did it because his his, the usgvt said we had to of we ever wanted to live together. I would have been fine without.

I also don't have and never want children. Things might be different if they were involved. It would still be pragmatic rather than some romantic notion

[dochas]

Not a chance.

[bcv513]

I am happily single and not interested in dating right now. Do I want to be alone for the rest of my life? Nope. I can see myself in a long term relationship where we each maintain our own space. Kind of like marriage without having to wash his underwear lol

[chilerellanos]

Dating is such an absolute shit show that I cannot imagine marrying.

Because wow.

[sparkythelawyer]

I'm not opposed to getting married again, but I realistically don't see it happening.

Under no circumstances will I change my name ever, EVER again.

[moreace01]

My marriage did end (I realize I'm technically not in the correct board here, but it's one of the only ones still active). I've been unmarried for 11 years (I think?? I honestly don't even remember). I've been in a relationship for 7 years, living together for 4. We've talked about getting married and eh, no real need at this point in our lives.

And I don't have kids, so as another poster above mentioned - I'm gonna have to figure out some kind of Golden Girls arrangement at some point in my life. Which sounds kinda fun, tbh.

[Susie]

In the near term I'd be a hard no because I don't have time to do any of the kinds of things that would result in me meeting anyone.

When my kids are older and more independent, I guess never say never?  

My dad absolutely won't; he's been widowed for almost 8 years.  He was married to my mom for 38 years when she died.  I can't imagine how difficult a shift that must be, but 8 years out, he still hasn't really dealt with the grief, has said many times how much he hates living alone, and has made no steps toward anything he'd enjoy more.  That is more sad to me than sweet/loyal/etc.  She died of cancer, but that doesn't mean he should stop living too.

[windyseas]

Absolutely not. At least, not until DD is grown and moved out. I don't trust men enough to trust them with my kid.

[jinkies]

I can't imagine a scenario where I would ever remarry if something were to happen to my H.

I could see dating, but I wouldn't want to live with someone again. Having my own space that no one else can touch is like my biggest fantasy right now.

[Vally]

Omg my subconscious things about this A LOT apparently. I have recurring dreams that I’m stressing about getting married for a third time. There’s no reason I should, my H and I are happily married, but for some reason my brain worries about this. I also don’t care if someone marries three times, but I think knowing I’ve been divorced once, god forbid it happens again, and then what!? Lol no idea. I vacillate between thinking I’d become a crazy dog lady, being a complete recluse, taking up lovers, yes plural, or most likely, settling down again.

[emilyinchile]

Feb 9, 2024 11:04:48 GMT -5 cmeon said:

Definitely goats.

I thought this was a reference to goat FARM, which is the opposite end of the spectrum in terms of answers!

I'm getting remarried in 2 months, so my answer is pretty obvious.

[twinmomma]

I did get divorced in 2018 and just got remarried this past summer. I was only 32 when I got divorced, so I definitely knew I wanted to get back into the dating world and not be alone for the rest of my life. That would have been a very long, very lonely time!

I did a lot of work in therapy before I even considered dating again because my first husband was an emotionally abusive jerk who cheated on me. Then I did a lot of first/second dates and "played the field" for a while before meeting my now H. I had divorced my high school boyfriend, so I had literally never dated anyone else. I took advantage of the opportunity to explore the dating world, as wild as it was sometimes. H and I just ended up "clicking" and our relationship grew pretty naturally and slowly. I have two kids from my first marriage and he has one, so we had to do a lot of work to blend our families and get everyone comfortable with the situation.

We ended up getting married because it finally just felt right. We had bought a house together and knew this was a forever thing, so we had a quick backyard ceremony and it was great! We are very clear about how we handle our finances separately, handle co-parenting and step-parenting, each still do our own thing a lot of the time, etc. so that we didn't set ourselves up to fail.