I bought hotels and flights for some to come to our wedding. I didn't clear the hotels with them first. I'm pretty darn considerate yet I wold be pissed if one of them complained about their accommodations when I went out of my way to be helpful.
i didn't read the 4 pages, but why is everybody calling her an asshole? yes it was beyond nice her sister paid for it, and i'd be forever greatful but i don't think any harm is done (with having two kids) asking about changing a flight with less lay-overs and better time, with paying all the differnces. Guess i'm an asshole too.
Side note- i believe it all about the approach she took with her sister as well, and if he sister got mad. I'd most likely drop it, but i don't think is was all that terrible to ask.
She can't change the flights because its on a different airline. She was upset that the sister didn't by fully refundable tickets which are a shitton more money. So now she doesn't even want to go... TO HAWAII FOR FREE.
so she can't cancel at all because flight money will be lost? not because its a 50$ or whatever cancel fee but the 2800 will be refunded? if its the first then yeah, suck it up. It's your sisters wedding.
i didn't read the 4 pages, but why is everybody calling her an asshole? yes it was beyond nice her sister paid for it, and i'd be forever greatful but i don't think any harm is done (with having two kids) asking about changing a flight with less lay-overs and better time, with paying all the differnces. Guess i'm an asshole too.
Side note- i believe it all about the approach she took with her sister as well, and if he sister got mad. I'd most likely drop it, but i don't think is was all that terrible to ask.
Um, because she is.
Had you read further, you would have seen that the oh-so-awful sister dropped nearly three grand to fly this spoiled brat and her entire family to Hawaii.
Suck it up. I've flown with an infant and a with a toddler. With layovers. At 4 am, in the middle of the night, with only my H to help me. It's not that big a deal. Seriously, you look like a total tool for the crap you're bitching about when your sister is paying three grand for you.
I think if your sister really wanted her whole family at her wedding, she wouldn't have had it in Hawaii. But that doesn't excuse you accepting her paying for your ticket and then bitching about it. You should have said no and stuck to it.
I do think it's weird that people are shaming you with the whole "It's your sisters wedding, I would do ANYTHING to be at my sisters wedding!!!!" Dude, she chose to have her wedding in Hawaii. When you choose something like that, you do it with the understanding that some people can't be there.
I think if your sister really wanted her whole family at her wedding, she wouldn't have had it in Hawaii. But that doesn't excuse you accepting her paying for your ticket and then bitching about it. You should have said no and stuck to it.
I do think it's weird that people are shaming you with the whole "It's your sisters wedding, I would do ANYTHING to be at my sisters wedding!!!!" Dude, she chose to have her wedding in Hawaii. When you choose something like that, you do it with the understanding that some people can't be there.
Sure. But when the bride offers to pay for a family of four to go on a Hawaiian vacation, you don't bitch about a bad layover. Capisce?
i didn't read the 4 pages, but why is everybody calling her an asshole? yes it was beyond nice her sister paid for it, and i'd be forever greatful but i don't think any harm is done (with having two kids) asking about changing a flight with less lay-overs and better time, with paying all the differnces. Guess i'm an asshole too.
Side note- i believe it all about the approach she took with her sister as well, and if he sister got mad. I'd most likely drop it, but i don't think is was all that terrible to ask.
Um, because she is.
Had you read further, you would have seen that the oh-so-awful sister dropped nearly three grand to fly this spoiled brat and her entire family to Hawaii.
Suck it up. I've flown with an infant and a with a toddler. With layovers. At 4 am, in the middle of the night, with only my H to help me. It's not that big a deal. Seriously, you look like a total tool for the crap you're bitching about when your sister is paying three grand for you.
OMG.
i'm feeling anger over here. I said it was all about the approach. I'd ask my sister, nicely. You know? because i feel as family we can do that. BUT i wouldn't push it if she said no and be along my way and on the plane to her wedding.
Post by sherbanator on Jan 12, 2013 15:37:13 GMT -5
OP- There is obviously some weird emotional relationship between you and your sister but I really do think that you should be the bigger person right now and start making that relationship with her better. I have no doubt it will take work and time but it can be done. She loves you and genuinely wanted you and your family there for her wedding. Spending over 3000.00 on tickets and hotel was NOT a power play. Get a thank you card and write a heartfelt thank you for those fucking tickets and apologize for your part in this drama.
There is no way to rationalize anything that you have said here because it is quite clear your relationship with sis is no longer logical and completely emotional but you can start being a better sister and think about what you are grateful for instead of what you wish you could change.
I promise this is not a flame- I am sure your bad relationship with your sister is not a one sided thing and you both play your parts quite well. It doesn't have to feel like this for you- just start fixing it now before it is too late.
I was seriously scratching my head at the first few responses calling OP's sister a bitch/snatch/telling the OP to stay home and blow off the $$$ tickets gifted to her because diapers are too hard...
glad to see everyone came to their senses. I'm seriously loling at this problem. damn your cheapass sister, OP! fuckin' economy.
I get that you're upset she didn't check with you before buying the tickets, but seriously $2800 for tickets to Hawaii PLUS hotel stay!!! You really need to put this in perspective, maybe try seeing it from her point of view. Do you really think she went out of her way to find the worst possible flight for you? If you think that little of her, maybe you should have said no from the beginning.
I'm really not looking forward to being on a red eye with a toddler who won't sleep unless he's in a bed.
Honestly? Your parents might not either. They might have asked for a separate flight. Your sister, understandably, might not be interested in starting her wedding being expected to help care for two screaming toddlers she is paying to fly *and* room.
Perhaps you can take that perspective: despite all the burdens you've placed on your sister *for her wedding* at least you don't have to worry that your kids will make her flight a living hell. It isn't much, but it's the least you can do
I just reread the posts and the stories aren't consistent. OP says thy couldn't book at first because the flight was booked and now there are openings with a price difference. The follow up posts make it sound like she could have booked it but didn't want to because of the price difference. Am I reading this right? Please get the stories straight.
This is why I do not do a lot of favors any more for my family. No matter what, drama and bitching.
I can't tell if the OP thinks her sister was lying about the other flight being full, even though her first post pointed out that new seats recently opened on the parents' flight. Since the OP knows they are on two different airlines making it really troublesome to change at this point, I assumed she thinks her sister lied to save the $50.
Post by heliocentric on Jan 12, 2013 16:04:20 GMT -5
I think the OP is being ungrateful.
Also, maybe the tickets are "only" $50 different now, but they might've been more when she originally booked. Prices change often. Are you sure you know what she paid for your parents.
I'm not sure why I'm even asking this question, because when someone else pays it's their choice. End of story.
people, she already agreed to go. what happened to no backsies?
either get the flight information and change the flights--which should be in your own name anyway-- on your own, or deal with the flights you don't prefer, or don't go and recognize that this likely could be the end of your relationship with your sister. a series of shitty options, but that's what you've got available.
ETA: and "livid"? really? she was rude, but damn. first you refused to come to her wedding. then you decided only to come on HER dime. then you told her the tickets she paid for weren't good enough. i think there's enough ill behavior to go around here.