Real talk, if he gets angry and wants to punch walls or throw hands, I will push a motherfucker right back. PPD will have an officer present if you need it; we just have to call the district and request it.
Post by amandakisser on Sept 9, 2016 9:08:31 GMT -5
Another vote of support! I know one of your worries was that you would hurt Lucy by leaving. Well, she let you know herself not to worry about that. She will persevere and thrive through all of this!
I live on the East Coast, so I can't offer physical support, but I can offer emotional support and give some good advice. This is the catalyst you were waiting for - you're stronger than you know!
I was so afraid to leave. He was an alcoholic, loved his drink way more than his family, and actually hit me once. So, I finally did it. I got my ducks in a row, visited a lawyer, talked to me my mom and one day I took the kids and left. Gone. Served him divorce papers same day. It was scary but oh so freeing. I lived with my mom for a few months, then got a small apartment and we were so happy. No yelling, no one coming home drunk hours after work, no one calling me names, telling me know one else would ever want me because I was ugly and worthless. He was wrong.
It is hard and scary but, that first day knowing you don't have to listen to someone call you a name one more time, or your children crying because daddy is mean, is the best feeling ever.
I realize that I don't post here a whole lot, but I wanted you to know that I'm rooting for you, ProfessorArtNerd! You're a strong, amazing person, with a strong, amazing daughter. You are worth so much.
I only noticed boxertdog's question. Who else is being a jerk?
Thanks for that. My very next post was an apology as I didn't have the full context of her situation.
If you don't have the full context of a very serious situation in someone's life, do not comment. If you don't know what's going on, you don't need to say anything.
Post by Captain Catnip on Sept 9, 2016 10:00:41 GMT -5
You can do this. Lucy is saying she can handle it. Do this before it's a while later and D says the same thing. We are all here for you. I can help as much as possible here in Pittsburgh.
I'm generally shit with words so I hope this comes across correctly, but please focus on today and your future. You are in a bad situation (of which you are a VICTIM, not a perpetrator), and you can't go back in time to change that. But you have this amazing little cheerleader, and a group of heart-warming and equally bad-ass philly girls at the ready, and then a sea of strangers-of-varying-degrees around the country/world. And we ALL believe in your ability to make the changes needed to give you and your kids an end to this shitty situation and a chance for real happiness going forward.
You might be scared, but that doesn't define you. You are also smart, kind, strong, protective, compassionate... and you don't have to do a single bit of this alone. Not one tiny bit.
I just want to offer hugs and support. Your daughter is amazing, and she gets that from you. We all just want to see you happy and free from this torture. You deserve a happy life.
So many hugs to you, Prof. You are an amazing mother and you have not fucked anything or anyone up. Lucy is smart so she sees how much stress your H puts on you. I know it's not easy to leave but please, please do what is best for you and the kids.
I am also local and I know I'm new-ish around here but I am also willing to help in any way needed.
ProfessorArtNerd, you are raising an awesome, strong, and smart girl in L. Please always remember that. I am not near you, but I want to help you in any way I can. Please know you are loved, and are deserving of happiness.
Back in here after catching up more. I am thinking about you right now and hope So much that you are running with the heartfelt advice from all of these beautiful strong women in here who have been there and want to help you!♡
YOU'RE GOING TO DO THIS! ♡ AND YOUR STRENGTH WILL BE THE LIGHT THAT LUCY REMEMBERS!
Post by ClosingTime08 on Sept 9, 2016 11:42:03 GMT -5
I had posted in a previous thread of yours about leaving my husband and how much things were for the better now (I have a 4yr old son).
I echo a lot of other people's sentiments here. Your daughter is telling you it's ok to leave and to not feel guilty..you don't need to stay for them. You're a great mom to have raised such a smart and strong little girl. YOU CAN DO THIS. If I have learned one thing, take the help people are offering! There is no reason to think that you are alone in any of this, take the help.
Hug yourself, love yourself, focus on what you want for the future and breathe.... internet friends and strangers are offering help, take it. There is no shame in it. I live in NNJ and would help in a heartbeat, because I have been there. Have someone with you when you tell him if you are afraid, have the kids out of the house when you tell him...take your daughter's strength and channel it. YOU CAN DO THIS.
I'm not in Wawa land anymore, but I have a couple Philly PD friends and I know I could wrangle one to come hang around the house while you tell him what's up. Just say the word and I'll start making calls.
I know I'm still new to this board, but I want to echo all the people in here who said you are not fucking your lives up at all. Lucy has grown into such a brave, mature little girl and is a reflection of you. She's being the voice you need to hear right now. I truly hope you take some of the women up on their offers of help and can make your exit. You're so strong, you've got this.