A thread for those of us separated/divorced

[starburst604]

It seems like we have more posters than usual who are going through it right now - either considering divorce, going through the process or are recently divorced. I hesitate to post too frequently about my situation because I don’t want to be an AW, but it feels tough to think or talk about much else right now. I thought we could have a thread to share wins, vent, seek advice and commiserate about our day to day stuff.

So share whatever is on your mind right now if you feel so inclined!

At the moment I am siting at a restaurant bar near my work having dinner because I don’t feel like going home. STBX dropped DD at soccer practice and I agreed to pick her up, but I just don’t feel like being at home with him until it’s time to get her. So I’ll just kill some time here.

[chilerellanos]

I will say, good for you on posting.

Because I felt really alone (IRL, and on the board) when I was going through mine.

I withdrew from people IRL; but also disappeared from the board. And looking back, probably should have gotten support where I could get it, but I don’t really feel like there were a lot of separations happening then.

[puppyluv]

I have been going through it since December. Finally sold the house and moved out a couple weeks ago. Its been crazy and it sucks. I am trying to hold it together all the time but it’s so hard. I am lucky to have a really great friend circle who have been there for me through it all.

Big Hugs to you. I completely understand the feeling of not wanting to be around the ex. It did get a little easier when I didnt have to see his face everyday.

[starburst604]

puppyluv hugs to you too. Sounds like you are just ahead of me on the track. Our house sale will close 6/28 and once he moves out next week I’ll live here until the sale and then I’ll move into my townhouse which closes the same time. I’m glad you have a great support circle but I know how hard it is when you’re alone and don’t know who to talk to. I hope things will feel better for you soon. ❤️

[prettypitties]

I separated from my XH in September 2020, and I totally relate with not being able to focus or talk about much else at that time. I was really lucky to have a handful of close friends and family members who were incredibly supportive and willing to let me talk their ears off about it, lol.

Nearly 4 years later, my life has improved *exponentially*. XH and I didn't have kids, so that simplified matters, but it was still a tough thing to go through. Anyway, all that to say that I empathize, and I'm glad you have people here and IRL to lean on.

[jenny1223]

XH and I separated in October 2020. Divorce was finalized last summer. Those first months are such a blur of emotions.

We still have a lot of conflict but it keeps getting easier. I'm so much happier and healthier. I've learned to better set boundaries and prioritize myself in all areas of my life.

I feel for everyone still early in the process or who are struggling.

[dancingnancy]

We split up 5 years ago and it was amicable. We co parent 15 yo DD very well. XH has had 4 girlfriends since then - he has gone from relationship to relationship - and he just told me he is moving in with his current gf of a year. She has 2 daughters and I see them moving towards marriage, and I am having feelings about DD having a step family, wondering what this means about my relationship with my 29 yo SD, how my relationship with him will change, etc. I will say that she seems very nice and has treated DD very well, so I am glad for that. Just interesting that 5 years later and being fully “over it”, there are new feelings to experience.

[pinkdutchtulips]

Granted it's been 11y (CRIKES its been that long!) but I remember it being a rough go in the beginning bc I had the DVRO and he couldn't follow it. Things got better after I got the Penal Code Protective Order. The best part was getting my independence back. I could stop at Target on the way home w/o being interrogated. We could stop at the park, no interrogation. It felt wonderful! That lead apron had been removed. I felt like myself again .... I had been someone else for 11-12y and I was ready to let that person go.

[1confused1]

I just wanted to offer all of you, where ever you are in the process, support and hugs.

I am 12 years out and my life is exponentially better than when we were married and going through the divorce. My divorce was highly contested, ended up a victim of DV and the process went on for yours.

12 years later, we are actually successfully co-parenting. I never thought we would be in this place, but it is so good for the kids.

Happy to chat if anyone needs advice or has questions.

[wanderingback]

Sending lots of hugs and support. I think I’ve been divorced for about 12 years now and it really seems like a distant memory. We didn’t have kids together so that obviously makes a clean break easier but it’s amazing how a weight is really lifted off once you are on your own even if things are still emotionally difficult. You will get through it and be so much happier.

[sadlebred]

Life is good on the other side. Give yourself time to grieve. Get some professional help if you need it--nothing wrong with it! Even if it's just a neutral party to talk things through with. I went through my divorce utterly alone. It reminded me that I was strong. We didn't have kids, and it was 30 days from the day of filing that our divorce was final.

[sent]

Thank you for starting this. I feel alone in general despite always being surrounded by people. I have very few friends I can talk with IRL about this. I can't monopolize their time either so back to feeling alone. I had a therapist about a year ago but it became impossible to schedule appointments with her. Maybe I should do a few more sessions with her again now that we have new schedules. I have a few brain dump thoughts ahead.

pinkdutchtulips , I forgot about the interrogations. I would sometimes stop at a grocery store and pick up some things, usually stuff for the kids. I'd get an earful once I got home about why I didn't tell him I was going to the grocery store. Then I'd wonder if I was the bad wife in this situation because I should probably ask as a courtesy since we are supposed to be a family. Doing little favors like that seems like the family thing to do. But sometimes I would purposely not tell him because I knew he would ask to pick up all these specific vegetables. I didn't have the mental energy to go through the produce aisle and sort the cucumbers, find the plum tomatoes and sort them, etc. and spend the extra time doing all that. All I really needed to go in for was to restock on dino nuggets for DS's lunch. The sooner I could get home, the sooner I could put DS to bed and relax. He had plenty of opportunity to go to the grocery store and spend the time to buy his own crazy vegetable list but he would almost never go "because you're going there any way." I could continue this story with more absurdity but it doesn't matter, it all boiled down to disrespect of me, my feelings, my energy, my time.

That's been my word for 2024. Disrespect.

Another thing I've been pondering is "who am I?" Those things I liked doing pre-husband and pre-kids like walking neighborhoods for leisure + exercise or baking desserts, will I want to do those things again someday? I feel like my kids don't even know who I used to be before them because they've rarely or maybe never seen their dad do or say anything about mommy's interests. Like even a simple "oh, we are going to a bakery to look for this flavor of cake for mommy's birthday because it's her favorite." The last time he got me that cake, it was the year where DD was still in the NICU but I was home and it was my birthday. I've wanted to leave since DD was an inside baby. She turned 10 back in December. I broke down on her birthday when I realized that a decade had passed and here I was still thinking about how to leave.

[sugarbear1]

I'm almost fours years out from leaving and my life, too, has markedly improved.

We do coparent pretty well and never speak ill of the other in front of the kids. Or in general, really. My ex is a decent guy.

That said, Covid made him super anxious and DS1 just tested positive today. I texted exH and have not yet heard back, though I expect to get a very loud and paranoid earful from him. My stomach is in knots.

[trytobearunner34]

Thank you for this. My husband and I separated in January and we have a now 7 year old. Our state requires physical separation of a year and a day before you are allowed to file for divorce so that means we are married until at least January 2025:/. I always thought the law was ridiculous and now living it feels even more so.

My husband asked for the separation, but ultimately I think I have most benefited. By many people’s standards our marriage ok. We had to work on our marriage a lot like most people but, other than family time, there was really nothing life giving in our relationship to balance out all that work. In hindsight, I was sticking i
it out because leaving made me feel like a “quitter” and the eternal optimist in me thought if I just stuck it out somehow it would be worth it. However, now that the door has been opened and I have walked through it I will not walk back in.

Our separation has been very amicable. We are good co-parents and have amicably divided assets in a way we have both found fair. I had posted here about what to do about his stuff as he just wasn’t doing anything about getting it out of the house. I had to carry virtually every item he owned to him box by box each day I dropped of my daughter (it took two months with virtually daily drop offs). That was a PITA but was an excellent reminder of why I no longer want to be married to him.

Our daughter struggles with what she calls “The Big Change”. Last week was a particularly hard week for her and at bedtime she told me “I want us all to live in the same house where we each have our own room.”, “You have made a mistake.”, “My heart is broken.”.💔 We continue to support her in her feelings and she began play therapy at the beginning on April so between that, time and our continued efforts to put her first I am hoping she doesn’t someday post on a message board about how her parents ruined her life when she was in first grade😬.

Even with her struggles I still think ultimately this is for the best as I have felt lighter over the last 5 months than I have in a very, very long time. I have used my time for introspection and time with family and friends which has been hugely beneficial. Divorce Care was also helpful. Hugs to all on this journey.

[ax2]

This thread couldn’t have come at a better time. My XH and I separated last fall and he moved out in January and I’ve really been struggling with the loneliness. We have two kids (8 & 11) who have been doing ok, I think? We’re still on ok terms, but every time I see him it seems to get less friendly; I imagine he’s dating again and will have less use for my friendship in the near future, which is going to make coparenting harder.

I don’t have many people left in my life and I’m very lucky to have my best friend and her husband who have really been there for me and helped me through everything. But I always feel like I’m third wheeling and it gets hard watching happily married people all the time.

Anyhow, hugs to everyone going through it. It’s terrible even if it’s for the best.

[sadlebred]

sent You will find yourself again. You may enjoy doing those things or find new outlets and avenues to enjoy. Don't rush it. Let everything happen as it goes. Once he is out of the house, the divorce is final, you'll find them. It will take having physical and mental space for yourself. For now I recommend if you feel like going on a walk by yourself, do it...even if it's for 15 minutes. Use the time to clear your head, listen to some music/fun podcast, and just breathe. Don't worry about finding yourself too soon. YOU will emerge when you are ready.

[chchchia]

So we separated in 2016, divorced in 2017, very acrimonious. I went through so much and learned a lot about myself. My mother was also in hospice and I lost her in 2019. There were times I did not think I was going to make it through, I lost so much but my kids are the reason I am here today. My ex was very abusive and a cheater and I always said I would not leave a marriage bc I was committed. He is now married to the person the person he cheated on me with and the thing is, I am somewhat grateful he left bc I don't think I would have. I believe in marriage and commitments and I think when you make that commitment you work through it. I am glad he left. Every year that passes I feel freer and so much more like my old self before we were married. I did not realize how unhappy I was until I wasn't anymore. Oh I could go on and on but I won't.
Thanks for starting this thread.

[Violet]

sent, I hope this comes off as a positive message and not creepy… A long time ago you made a comment about your marriage and it made me so sad for you. I don’t remember the context even. I just remember it was something like how much you wanted to leave but couldn’t until your kids were grown. I am so happy that has changed and you are getting the freedom you deserve. Enjoy your new life.

[nospaekae]

I'm mostly a lurker here, but my H of 10 years and I are going through the process right now. He approached me 2 months ago with doubts about our relationship. We had some long talks and while our relationship was not perfect, I didn't see anything that we couldn't work through. There was no cheating (that I know of), we were respectful of each other, no abuse. But he had no desire to work on things.

I filed because he couldn't even seem to work up the ability to do that. Just another piece of emotional labor I've had to take on. I think he's dealing with some depression/midlife crisis stuff. He has completely checked out of not only our relationship, but also life in general. No desire to get help. He wants a relationship like he had in his 20s with "passion and spark." Completely ignoring the fact that you have to work towards those things in a long term relationship. He's also taken up smoking clove cigarettes LOL.

I got my ass in gear right away. Back in therapy and house hunting. I went under contract on a house back in my hometown (300 miles away) earlier this week. Fingers crossed that the process goes smoothly.

In addition to all this mess, I'm dealing a health issue that he knows nothing about. It's weird to go through things alone and not have him to turn to, but I just don't want to share anything personal with him.

[starburst604]

May 10, 2024 4:34:49 GMT -5 trytobearunner34 said:

Thank you for this. My husband and I separated in January and we have a now 7 year old. Our state requires physical separation of a year and a day before you are allowed to file for divorce so that means we are married until at least January 2025:/. I always thought the law was ridiculous and now living it feels even more so.

My husband asked for the separation, but ultimately I think I have most benefited. By many people’s standards our marriage ok. We had to work on our marriage a lot like most people but, other than family time, there was really nothing life giving in our relationship to balance out all that work. In hindsight, I was sticking i
it out because leaving made me feel like a “quitter” and the eternal optimist in me thought if I just stuck it out somehow it would be worth it. However, now that the door has been opened and I have walked through it I will not walk back in.

Our separation has been very amicable. We are good co-parents and have amicably divided assets in a way we have both found fair. I had posted here about what to do about his stuff as he just wasn’t doing anything about getting it out of the house. I had to carry virtually every item he owned to him box by box each day I dropped of my daughter (it took two months with virtually daily drop offs). That was a PITA but was an excellent reminder of why I no longer want to be married to him.

Our daughter struggles with what she calls “The Big Change”. Last week was a particularly hard week for her and at bedtime she told me “I want us all to live in the same house where we each have our own room.”, “You have made a mistake.”, “My heart is broken.”.💔 We continue to support her in her feelings and she began play therapy at the beginning on April so between that, time and our continued efforts to put her first I am hoping she doesn’t someday post on a message board about how her parents ruined her life when she was in first grade😬.

Even with her struggles I still think ultimately this is for the best as I have felt lighter over the last 5 months than I have in a very, very long time. I have used my time for introspection and time with family and friends which has been hugely beneficial. Divorce Care was also helpful. Hugs to all on this journey.

There are so many similarities in our situation! DD is 9 and has always been very invested in us being a family and I know she's going to start struggling once he moves out next week. While my personal interactions with STBX are up and down, for the most part the actual legal process and division of things is going well. We haven't argued over who is keeping what, he is being pretty fair to me financially, and we agreed on a co-parenting schedule pretty easily. I also anticipate that he is going to leave a ton of shit behind when he moves, and my plan is to put it in a pile in our garage and let him know that if he doesn't get it before the next trash day, it's going on the curb. While I'll be the sole occupant of the house once he moves, he's allowed to come by in the mornings to put DD on the bus so I can leave for work on time. That gives him plenty of opportunity to take his stuff. I have my own packing and purging to do and I'm not going to keep tripping over his crap. 

[starburst604]

nospaekae STBX is also struggling with depression, lifelong depression I think. He also seems to need that "passion and spark" and doesn't seem to get that it's not realistic to always have that. I'm sorry for your health struggles, I have thought to myself that if something like that happened to me it would be weird to not have him to turn to. Like you I wouldn't want to, it would make me feel too vulnerable with him somehow. Congrats on your new home and move, I wish I could move far away from him sometimes!

ax2 I'm sorry you're feeling lonely. While it feels so oppressive having STBX in the house right now, I'm sure I'm going to have periods of feeling lonely too when he moves. I can relate to finding it hard to be around other families sometimes. Last weekend we rode on a party bus with DD's hockey team to watch a game and I found myself feeling sad being surrounded by families with married parents.

dancingnancy yesterday I took the online co-parenting course that is required by our state as part of the divorce process. It didn't touch on how to deal with co-parenting when one or both spouses are in new relationships, and I felt like it would be helpful to include that. DD has asked each of us if we plan on getting married again and we both told her definitely not. But I can see him going from relationship to relationship because he can't sustain the effort it takes to keep one going for very long, IMO. I was around so long because we had a child and I just took it. I'm glad that your XH's girlfriend treats your daughter well - at the end of the day that's the important thing.

[blondemoment123]

Thanks for making this thread!

Separation is such a weird place. I have lots of thoughts and feelings I want to get out, but if I start typing now I might cry and that's not a good look at work lol.

[starburst604]

May 10, 2024 9:09:20 GMT -5 blondemoment123 said:

Thanks for making this thread!

Separation is such a weird place. I have lots of thoughts and feelings I want to get out, but if I start typing now I might cry and that's not a good luck at work lol.

hugs. I've described this period as purgatory. Still married but not really, and not quite single/divorced. A foot in both worlds. It's the most intense emotional rollercoaster I've ever experienced. 

[dancingnancy]

May 10, 2024 8:54:37 GMT -5 starburst604 said:

nospaekae STBX is also struggling with depression, lifelong depression I think. He also seems to need that "passion and spark" and doesn't seem to get that it's not realistic to always have that. I'm sorry for your health struggles, I have thought to myself that if something like that happened to me it would be weird to not have him to turn to. Like you I wouldn't want to, it would make me feel too vulnerable with him somehow. Congrats on your new home and move, I wish I could move far away from him sometimes!

ax2 I'm sorry you're feeling lonely. While it feels so oppressive having STBX in the house right now, I'm sure I'm going to have periods of feeling lonely too when he moves. I can relate to finding it hard to be around other families sometimes. Last weekend we rode on a party bus with DD's hockey team to watch a game and I found myself feeling sad being surrounded by families with married parents.

dancingnancy yesterday I took the online co-parenting course that is required by our state as part of the divorce process. It didn't touch on how to deal with co-parenting when one or both spouses are in new relationships, and I felt like it would be helpful to include that. DD has asked each of us if we plan on getting married again and we both told her definitely not. But I can see him going from relationship to relationship because he can't sustain the effort it takes to keep one going for very long, IMO. I was around so long because we had a child and I just took it. I'm glad that your XH's girlfriend treats your daughter well - at the end of the day that's the important thing.

Thank you ❤️ not gonna lie, that has been the bumpiest part. He went on his first date 10 days after he moved out, and within 2 months was Facebook official with someone, which was awful because there were people that didn’t even know yet that we were over. And with all 4 he introduced DD to them right away. I stopped protesting (and, frankly, he stopped running it by me) after the 2nd one. Meanwhile I mourned the loss of our marriage - even though I knew it was the right thing - for I’d say 6-8 months. I just hope for DD’s sake that he has learned what role he played in the demise of our marriage so he does not repeat the same mistakes. He also said in the beginning that he would never live with anyone again or get married again, but 5 years later here we are.

[starburst604]

May 10, 2024 9:15:27 GMT -5 dancingnancy said:

May 10, 2024 8:54:37 GMT -5 starburst604 said:

nospaekae STBX is also struggling with depression, lifelong depression I think. He also seems to need that "passion and spark" and doesn't seem to get that it's not realistic to always have that. I'm sorry for your health struggles, I have thought to myself that if something like that happened to me it would be weird to not have him to turn to. Like you I wouldn't want to, it would make me feel too vulnerable with him somehow. Congrats on your new home and move, I wish I could move far away from him sometimes!

ax2 I'm sorry you're feeling lonely. While it feels so oppressive having STBX in the house right now, I'm sure I'm going to have periods of feeling lonely too when he moves. I can relate to finding it hard to be around other families sometimes. Last weekend we rode on a party bus with DD's hockey team to watch a game and I found myself feeling sad being surrounded by families with married parents.

dancingnancy yesterday I took the online co-parenting course that is required by our state as part of the divorce process. It didn't touch on how to deal with co-parenting when one or both spouses are in new relationships, and I felt like it would be helpful to include that. DD has asked each of us if we plan on getting married again and we both told her definitely not. But I can see him going from relationship to relationship because he can't sustain the effort it takes to keep one going for very long, IMO. I was around so long because we had a child and I just took it. I'm glad that your XH's girlfriend treats your daughter well - at the end of the day that's the important thing.

Thank you ❤️ not gonna lie, that has been the bumpiest part. He went on his first date 10 days after he moved out, and within 2 months was Facebook official with someone, which was awful because there were people that didn’t even know yet that we were over. And with all 4 he introduced DD to them right away. I stopped protesting (and, frankly, he stopped running it by me) after the 2nd one. Meanwhile I mourned the loss of our marriage - even though I knew it was the right thing - for I’d say 6-8 months. I just hope for DD’s sake that he has learned what role he played in the demise of our marriage so he does not repeat the same mistakes. He also said in the beginning that he would never live with anyone again or get married again, but 5 years later here we are.

If you've followed my saga, STBX was already involved with someone before we separated and as far as I know he's still involved with her, not that I ask. I did ask him if he would not further complicate things for DD by introducing this woman to her quickly and he agreed, but who knows if he'll stick to it. The idea of him bringing her around friends and family nauseates me. Sadly it seems like it's common for divorced men to just jump into the next thing and not do any kind of self reflection - not that some women don't do this too. I just want to take my time to heal and mourn my marriage like you said. I wouldn't trust anyone who wanted to get involved with me in this hot mess stage I'm in! It would be nice to be in a relationship again someday, but the bar is going to be really, really high for future partners. 
 

[dancingnancy]

May 10, 2024 9:21:08 GMT -5 starburst604 said:

May 10, 2024 9:15:27 GMT -5 dancingnancy said:

Thank you ❤️ not gonna lie, that has been the bumpiest part. He went on his first date 10 days after he moved out, and within 2 months was Facebook official with someone, which was awful because there were people that didn’t even know yet that we were over. And with all 4 he introduced DD to them right away. I stopped protesting (and, frankly, he stopped running it by me) after the 2nd one. Meanwhile I mourned the loss of our marriage - even though I knew it was the right thing - for I’d say 6-8 months. I just hope for DD’s sake that he has learned what role he played in the demise of our marriage so he does not repeat the same mistakes. He also said in the beginning that he would never live with anyone again or get married again, but 5 years later here we are.

If you've followed my saga, STBX was already involved with someone before we separated and as far as I know he's still involved with her, not that I ask. I did ask him if he would not further complicate things for DD by introducing this woman to her quickly and he agreed, but who knows if he'll stick to it. The idea of him bringing her around friends and family nauseates me. Sadly it seems like it's common for divorced men to just jump into the next thing and not do any kind of self reflection - not that some women don't do this too. I just want to take my time to heal and mourn my marriage like you said. I wouldn't trust anyone who wanted to get involved with me in this hot mess stage I'm in! It would be nice to be in a relationship again someday, but the bar is going to be really, really high for future partners. 
 

Yes, I have been following. You have handled things so well considering his behavior. It is maddening when you think of the examples they are setting for our daughters. Like you, the end of my marriage taught me what I would not put up with ever again, and what mistakes I will not personally repeat and, like you said, that has set the bar high. I have had a couple casual relationships and that is it. I’m lucky that I have a great circle of friends that keep me busy. When and if I do meet someone I want to explore a relationship with it will be a looooong time before DD meets them. I hope your ex
is respectful when it comes to your DD meeting anyone for her sake. Ugh, men….so maddening! They’re like children with a shiny new toy 😡

[sadlebred]

This is in reply to a few comments.

Be lonely. Be by yourself. It's ok. You'll find things to fill the time. If you are lonely, seek out others. Get a friend to grab a coffee. Find somewhere for you and the kids to volunteer. Fill your heart making other people's day. Of course find time to be with only yourself, too. It gives you a lot of headspace to just think and be. Just know that it's ok. It will be ok.

[wildrice]

May 10, 2024 7:39:07 GMT -5 chchchia said:

 I did not realize how unhappy I was until I wasn't anymore. 

This sums up so much of what I experienced after leaving my marriage (11 years ago!). I knew things weren't ideal but I thought they were ok most of the time, but once I got out of that situation I realized how bad it was for me. Even stuff like I used to have to see a chiropractor for neck pain that I had for literally years, but has completely vanished for no other reason in the years since we split up. I truly believe that good marriages don't end so if it's ending, it's the right choice. And it nearly always is going to mean the woman (in a heterosexual relationship) is going to be happier in the long run. I really have yet to talk to a single female that I know who has ended up worse off when it comes to her happiness. Most of us have gone on to find a better relationship or realized how much they love being single and been happy staying that way and/or waiting for the right person to eventually come along. The divorce part of it SUCKS because there are so many weird emotions and logistics and unknowns, but I am often really excited to hear someone is getting divorced. It was one of the best things that ever happened to me. 

I hope you all share as much or as little as you want here! I doubt I'm in the minority in saying that this is part of why this community exists. It's not like we're chatting about earth shattering important stuff all day most days anyway, so hearing what our virtual friends are going through and supporting them through it is exactly what should be happening here IMO.

[sent]

The fact that the divorce process varies so wildly from state to state has been a revelation to me. I wanted a separation period. I think it would have been good for us to be alone for a bit so he could see what he stands to lose and if he wanted to continue being an a-hole or if he wanted to do the hard work and be better for the sake of all of us. I asked him for a separation at least twice and he refused. When I went for my first consult ever with a lawyer eight years ago, that's when I learned that separation is not a legal thing in my state. You are either married or divorced. He can live in the house right up until the papers are signed and if it means he drags his feet on signing them by extending the divorce process, he can continue to stay. The only way to get him out before papers are signed would be to file a restraining order and it is very hard to get the police to do anything unless there is evidence of physical abuse. Verbal and emotional abuse doesn't mean anything in the eyes of the law which is exactly what empowers him to do those things but stop short of the physical. Sure I could leave, but I don't want to risk the kids being traumatized by me being gone. DS still talks about "when the polices came" and he was maybe 4, so they obviously pick up on these things and it becomes part of their ugly memories. 

In my office, a lot of the employees are with the father of their children for a long time but not legally married to them. They own homes with them which I didn't know you could be on a mortgage with someone without being legally married to them. Twenty four year old me was raised to think that the people who make that choice were somehow beneath me and that I was better than them. Forty four year old me now gets it - the legal and financial consequences seem much worse being married to the father of my kids than if we didn't have that stupid piece of paper, at least in my state. It has been eye opening as an adult to see how different communities handle the whole concept of committed relationships and legal marriage.

[ax2]

May 10, 2024 9:09:20 GMT -5 blondemoment123 said:

Thanks for making this thread!

Separation is such a weird place. I have lots of thoughts and feelings I want to get out, but if I start typing now I might cry and that's not a good look at work lol.

I call those “closed door” days at the office, lol. I’m sorry you’re going through it too.