That's not actually what happened. The coffee scalded an old woman who was in the hospital for weeks with burns that never healed. That McDonald's had been cited numerous times for serving coffee that was too hot. It was actually a really egregious case that caused serious long term harm, not just someone annoyed they got a minor burn that went away an hour later.
It's not that easy to bring a frivolous lawsuit. I'm a defense lawyer, and even I think the deck is stacked against plaintiffs.
I understand. But in the normal world, where people dont have super thick hair and perfect number sixes, people would have gotten the reference.
I assume you mean people who aren't as intelligent and thoughtful, yes? Or people who have no knowledge of the actual circumstances of the coffee case? Ignorant people? Those people?
Putting "frivolous lawsuit" and this coffee case together is fucking dumb and you should know better. That woman sustained permanent injuries.
I would go with her to a service. I agree with frkls that she's going to see the disconnect between your refusal to let her go and your assertion that she can believe anything she wants.
I get that you personally don't believe; but she's curious, and so I'd take it as an opportunity. I may be in the minority here, but I don't think 8 is too young to discuss some of these issues. I was 8 when I was shoved into a Lutheran Bible school by a well-meaning aunt, and let me tell you, the lessons I learned there were not universally good or bad. I wasn't indoctrinated, I didn't come out of it thinking I was going to Hell, and it made me think really fucking hard about religion in general and what my friends and cousins were being force-fed.
If you're concerned about what she may pick up there, go with her and go to a service. Afterwards, take her out to brunch, and discuss the things she heard.
She's going to grow up with a lot of kids from a lot of different religions; it's worth it to expose her to some of it under your guidance so you can put into perspective some of the things she'll encounter.
I like this Idea. I also don't think she is too young this sort of talk. I'm just not completely sure how to approach it.
Just ask her a lot of questions about what she thinks of the service. Ask why she wants to go to that particular church, ask if she wants to try other churches, ask what it is that appeals to her. Open-ended questions like that are good for everyone. And keep an open mind -- she might want to go back, and that's okay. Make asking questions and exploring options a safe place for her.
Post by Lucy Honeychurch on May 25, 2016 9:02:39 GMT -5
I would go with her to a service. I agree with frkls that she's going to see the disconnect between your refusal to let her go and your assertion that she can believe anything she wants.
I get that you personally don't believe; but she's curious, and so I'd take it as an opportunity. I may be in the minority here, but I don't think 8 is too young to discuss some of these issues. I was 8 when I was shoved into a Lutheran Bible school by a well-meaning aunt, and let me tell you, the lessons I learned there were not universally good or bad. I wasn't indoctrinated, I didn't come out of it thinking I was going to Hell, and it made me think really fucking hard about religion in general and what my friends and cousins were being force-fed.
If you're concerned about what she may pick up there, go with her and go to a service. Afterwards, take her out to brunch, and discuss the things she heard.
She's going to grow up with a lot of kids from a lot of different religions; it's worth it to expose her to some of it under your guidance so you can put into perspective some of the things she'll encounter.
Y4m doesn't have the ability to selectively delete someone's PMs. Only PB could have done that.
And I know the timing was fishy, but as kirkette said she gave me the green light, and then I logged in to change the settings back and start working on delete requests. Just after that was when y4m sent me that message - because she was trying to delete boobys posts but they were gone already. I would pull all of my "receipts" but the messages just have dates, not times (at least on the app) so I can't prove right now that it happened this way.
I am sure this will end badly no matter what - as we knew that day - but I do not believe that y4m did anything fishy or deceitful.
She can delete her own PM, which, as I understand it, then deletes it from the recipient's box.
I'm sorry, I'm trying to get everything straight here. Someone contacted booby's work, she contacted the mods to request deletion, the mods said no, so booby asked Proboards?
Post by Lucy Honeychurch on Feb 25, 2016 20:35:39 GMT -5
I was berbled about this thread, so I'm coming out of retirement just to say this one thing.
For anyone who thought it was soooo suspicious, so "telling," that people deleted their histories and left, or anyone who thought it was hysteria or paranoia or anyone "making it about them," THIS IS WHY; and you can suck it for thinking it was about anything other than exactly what happened to smo and booby.
I could not possibly care less if it means people are disappointed in me or whatever. The animosity in those threads was toxic, and I'm not surprised that some fucking asshole decided to try to literally ruin someone's life as a result.
And I'm staying gone, not just because of smo and booby, but also because when booby tried to get help from the mods, they refused to delete her posts; and when she went over their heads to proboards, proboards did it within half an hour. I've lost a lot of trust in the mods because of that, and because they also deleted their conversations with booby immediately thereafter. That's pretty fucked up. Enough so that I actually spoke to my own HR department to warn them, because if you can't trust the mods to help you when you feel targeted, then what?
I deleted my past posts on January 25. I have not deleted any since then. I have not participated in, nor would I ever participate in, any off board retaliatory bullshit. I have stated repeatedly that I am not okay with that kind of thing and find it scary as fuck.
You've got to be fucking kidding me. I call bullshit on anyone being afraid of @kirkette other than fucking @booby. And all @booby had to do was STOP FUCKING HARASSING KIRKETTE AND BOOM SHE WAS NO LONGER AT RISK.
--------------------
Stepping back from my initial WTF reaction, if you really were fearful based on what kirkette was saying, then maybe that's a personal issue for you to work through off of the board. There's nothing wrong with that, and I'm speaking as someone who is often terrified of the responses I might get on here - I'm talking just verbal, public responses - I'm terrified because of my own issues stemming from my childhood. And that's mine to deal with, as much as I wish it wasn't.
Post by Lucy Honeychurch on Jan 31, 2016 12:41:46 GMT -5
I deleted my past posts on January 25. I have not deleted any since then. I have not participated in, nor would I ever participate in, any off board retaliatory bullshit. I have stated repeatedly that I am not okay with that kind of thing and find it scary as fuck.
To clarify: I've been having my posts deleted periodically for some months now, just because there is so much information out there. I requested y4m to delete my posts on October 16, and again on January 25, before these monster threads happened. My posts are still there throughout this incident and I stand by them. I never once defended booby's words, and in fact stated emphatically that I thought kirkette had every right to be upset. My only stance other than that has been to state that I am uneasy when threats of off-board retaliation happen, and I take them seriously. I've seen it happen many times on these boards, and it scares the shit out of me. I am neither condoning nor defending anything booby has said. In fact, booby and I have tangled many times over the years. I am incredibly sorry for what happened to smo, and I had absolutely no part in it, nor do I have any knowledge whatsoever about this incident. These boards have been a part of my life for a decade, and I value the discussions we have here. I've learned a great deal from them, and continue to do so. If my part in any of this has caused anyone to think I am racist, or a racist sympathizer, please know that I am sorry for that, and while it was never my intent, I understand that intent does not always matter. Anyone taking action in this matter is free to investigate my past posts. Google cache is available and I am sure proboards logs them. I absolutely hope they catch whomever was responsible for harassing smo in such a hateful way. I would never, ever engage in behavior like that. Thanks for reading.
To date I have really liked you and most of your posts. So maybe because of that i was shocked as shit to see you joining early on in the pile on that makes Kirkette out to be a crazy person when she was so obviously at her wits end, being bullied into an emotionally reactive place, and mad as hell and not going to take it anymore. Kirkette's MO is by default to try to understand where someone is coming from, to give people a chance to explain if taken the wrong way. She deserves that same consideration from those who see her posts regularly. Since you are active on the same boards as her you should have known that and had her back, or at least refrained from the pile on. Booby, DickMove and others clearly were being manipulative and pushing her buttons. And you sided with them. And stand by those comments.
If they were, I was not aware of any particularly racist or nefarious intent. I think in that thread I disagreed with the use of philanthropist, because I didn't think it was the right word to use? I certainly never called kirkette crazy. I do think her posts have been more intense lately, and obviously now I realize there was a pointed reason for that. In that respect, I absolutely apologize for not seeing any kind of pattern, and I put that down to my own cultural blindness. Regardless, I'm dropping this now, because this incident is not about me. I just wanted to clarify that I in no way, shape or form condone retaliation off board, and that that had been my position since these discussions began; and that there was nothing nefarious about my post deletion.
To clarify: I've been having my posts deleted periodically for some months now, just because there is so much information out there. I requested y4m to delete my posts on October 16, and again on January 25, before these monster threads happened. My posts are still there throughout this incident and I stand by them. I never once defended booby's words, and in fact stated emphatically that I thought kirkette had every right to be upset. My only stance other than that has been to state that I am uneasy when threats of off-board retaliation happen, and I take them seriously. I've seen it happen many times on these boards, and it scares the shit out of me. I am neither condoning nor defending anything booby has said. In fact, booby and I have tangled many times over the years. I am incredibly sorry for what happened to smo, and I had absolutely no part in it, nor do I have any knowledge whatsoever about this incident. These boards have been a part of my life for a decade, and I value the discussions we have here. I've learned a great deal from them, and continue to do so. If my part in any of this has caused anyone to think I am racist, or a racist sympathizer, please know that I am sorry for that, and while it was never my intent, I understand that intent does not always matter. Anyone taking action in this matter is free to investigate my past posts. Google cache is available and I am sure proboards logs them. I absolutely hope they catch whomever was responsible for harassing smo in such a hateful way. I would never, ever engage in behavior like that. Thanks for reading.
Post by Lucy Honeychurch on Jan 30, 2016 14:06:46 GMT -5
Yeah, no. This shit is insane, and I do not know why people get so fucking crazed over the internet that they retaliate in real life. I'm out for a while. This place is fucking psycho.
Post by Lucy Honeychurch on Jan 30, 2016 13:56:08 GMT -5
I will never, ever understand why anyone on these boards feels the need to take retribution offline like this. I haven't always seen eye-to-eye with you, smo, but holy crap, I'm so sorry someone did this to you.
Post by Lucy Honeychurch on Jan 29, 2016 14:23:47 GMT -5
I love it. it's cozy and it was inexpensive and it's been perfect for us. We're going to need a bit more space in the next few years, but I'll be sad to leave this house. It's awesome.
Post by Lucy Honeychurch on Jan 29, 2016 13:09:41 GMT -5
I'm sort of meh on posting in the last couple of days. There are a lot of people at whom I'm looking differently.
I'll probably end up working this weekend; things have been crazy. And both boys need new pants. They keep outgrowing pants. Like, every week, it seems.