Post by amberlyrose on Jul 19, 2021 13:07:14 GMT -5
Thank you guys- this really is making me feel better I think it helps that they do know my friends here (see winecat's response) and my husband's sister and BIL are excited to have them around too. My mom just had knee replacement and it's been hard not to be there to help but she's adamant that DH and I get some time together alone while we still can.
I can occupy them with projects at my house. I'm happy to show up for dinner anytime as well.
I think discussing ground rules/boundaries/whatever you want to call them is a healthy idea. Talking about how day to day life is going to go once they are living there so that there's not assumptions which can lead to misunderstandings and hurt feelings. I'm not sure how it came to be that you lived across the street from your maternal grandparents, but it was a decision that they made. I'm guessing that there was growing pains that you might not remember or happened before you were born. Maybe AARP or other senior focused groups could help with resources, like a therapist/mediator/facilitator that could help? Not having you and R being their whole lives is a valid concern and worth discussing with them. It won't be healthy for you or them.
You've lived with your parents loooong term; R hasn't. Living with someone temporarily is a whole different ballgame. Your concerns are valid but not insurmountable.
My parents love you so much- I'm sure they'll be happy to have you over any time! My dad loves to randomly bake too When I was little, my parents bought a house on one end of the block, then my aunt moved in across the street at the other end of the block. Grandparents decided to buy a house soon after. Haha. The other aunts lived in more rural areas, so our neighborhood basically became a family block party for most holidays. I loved it. But they did have ground rules on both sides and we've talked about that before.
I'm hoping with the senior center around the corner and the school across the street, my parents will find things to fill their time. My mom wants to volunteer at the school with the tutoring program.
My parents live nearby (20-25 min, though we often meet up at in between spots) and it's great. They actually moved here after we did for my dad's job, but have both since retired. They definitely keep busy on their own with hobbies, friends, volunteering, etc., but are more than happy to work around our schedule to get together and watch kids pretty much every time we ask. They also rarely stop by unannounced, if one or both of them happen to be nearby they'll text first to make sure it's ok to visit. It's especially appreciated because DH travels a lot for work, so knowing that I've got that safety net is a huge weight off my shoulders.
I didn't grow up with grandparents nearby and was never close to any of them, and I really love the relationship my kids have with my parents. 10/10, totally recommend.
Pre-covid, DH traveled 90% for work and will probably go back to 50% in the future. He's also in the military reserves and I'm sure will have a few more trainings/deployments during his career. The idea that I'll have them nearby really is a huge weight off my shoulders now that we are looking to have kids.
DH didn't live near his grandparents but he spent weeks on end in the summers with them and we talk about how special those relationships were to us. I "ran away" a lot to my grandparents
Post by amberlyrose on Jul 19, 2021 10:52:35 GMT -5
Ours doesn't purify very well, so I won't link them, but I highly suggest looking at reviews about how quiet it actually is. The one we have in the living room was too loud to run during the day when DH was on work calls so our second one for the bedroom was purchased with that in mind and is much quieter.
Post by amberlyrose on Jul 19, 2021 10:46:49 GMT -5
Tell me your good stories or advice because it's all starting to get real.
A few years ago, I mentioned to DH that once we have kids, I'd be sad that my parents would be far away and wouldn't have that close relationship I had with my maternal grandparents (they lived across the street from us). So about two years ago, he brought up the idea of building an ADU/in-law apartment and we brought the idea up to my parents for their retirement, which at the time was maybe 5 years away. They loved it and we started the process of finding a builder and getting the city approvals started. Then the pandemic hit. My dad retired last April and my mom is looking to retire next summer after this school year. DH and I regularly "live" with my parents once a year between thanksgiving and Christmas since we work from home, so this wouldn't be a crazy adjustment for us, just different since it's our property and not theirs. But now we need to add in that they'll both be retired with a ton of free time in a new city, so I'm worried that they'll be a little more needy/clingy than we are used to. We also have a construction delay because of the pandemic and they might need to move into the house with us first.
So if you have some good stories or advice to make the transition easier, I'd appreciate it. Talk me off the ledge. lol. DH sees no issues with this, loves my parents and is no help right now.
Post by amberlyrose on Jul 15, 2021 13:45:43 GMT -5
I've been with my company for about 8 years in a remote/travel role. About 90% of the company was either traveling or working from home. Networking is also a huge part of our jobs, so we were pretty good at this before Covid. I like it because I love socializing once every few weeks, but I'm really an introvert that needs 3 days to decompress from a social event.
A few things we did pre-Covid 1- Quarterly all hands meetings for departments. We went to our closest local office, but most of the meeting presentation was over Teams. Usually free lunch and paid HH nearby. For those that could not make it, they might get an Uber Eats credit or option to expense like $20 for lunch or drinks. 2- Lunch and Learn sessions through employee resource groups. Budget tended to be smaller, so food was only provided for those in person but there was always a call-in option. 3- Two big social events, usually in the summer and winter. The summer one was a big blowout with prizes, music, and catered meals. If you wanted to network, that was the place to be. People would travel to the nearest office and many teams would plan big meetings to coincide with it. 4- Monthly networking days. In my first office, it was first Friday. Current office, it was the 3rd Friday. If you enjoyed going, you could easily plan around it and we'd encourage each other to go and hang out. Portions of the day's events (learning calls, etc) had virtual options.
During the pandemic: 1- Sounds cheesy, but my favorite social events were crafty things and I'm not crafty. We did a paint and sip, with the company paying for two kits per employee that joined. So many people had their kids involved. Another was a women's event where we made an air plant terrarium during a panel discussion. 2- Wellness challenges, cooking, workout, or meditation classes. If you didn't want to turn on your camera, you didn't have to. 3- Random swag bags. I swear half my kitchen is now branded items. lol! Coffee cups with a gc, shirts to wear on virtual HH calls, etc.
No one was ever penalized for not getting involved, but I love that there are a ton of options so you can really build that community remotely within your interests. Some of my closest friends at work are people I see maybe twice a year, if that.
Post by amberlyrose on Jul 12, 2021 13:28:08 GMT -5
I'm sensitive to altitude changes and I regularly go between Denver and LA, so I've gotten pretty good at avoiding it I highly suggest the pedialyte packets that you can put in bottled water. I usually have one the day of travel and then another the next day. Carry extras in case you are feeling dehydrated during your visit, but I found just drinking water regularly is fine after the first day. I also have a salty or carb heavy meal on the first day.
For hiking/biking in Denver, there's not much within the city except through the urban neighborhoods. In Rino, I'd grab a bike to brewery hop or head to one of the big parks for a picnic. There is also the Cherry Creek trail to walk or bike.
Post by amberlyrose on Jul 6, 2021 14:36:14 GMT -5
I'm so sorry We lost our girl at the beginning of June and it's a heartbreak I would not wish on anyone. You know it's coming but it doesn't make it any easier.
I'm glad your friend is there to keep you company. <3
While I do think that when you live in a city, you need to expect to see some weird stuff - I think the flip is also true. When you live in a city - or any situation where you live in close proximity to your neighbors - you need to be aware of it and behave respectfully. I do not think it's respectful of your neighbor to be doing this stuff in front of an open window, especially if children are in the home but even if they weren't.
We live in a townhouse and our kitchen windows look right out onto the sidewalk. I like to have the curtains open during the day because it's the only natural light on that side of the house, but if my H insists on walking around in his underwear (which he often does, lol), we will shut them. And he's not even doing anything sexual. I just think it would be weird for us to have him on display like that for the whole neighborhood. He's perfectly allowed to walk around like that in our house, but we don't have to show it to everyone.
I hope the neighbors keep their curtains closed! I guess another option would be to wave at them through your windows next time you see them doing this. If you make eye contact and give a pointed look, I bet they will be embarrassed and close the windows.
Agree.
And also, this brings up a thought I've had all along - TOP DOWN BLINDS!! When we lived in the city and could easily see from our bedroom into the homes across the street, we invested in top down blinds. I could put them 1/2 way down and get lots of natural light and not feel like people across the street, or even walking down the street, could look into my bedroom.
It was lovely!
I just put these in my front windows to see how they'll hold up. We have long, skinny windows so they could see everything from the street.
It also prevents the dog from barking at everything that walks by
I have an older LG that we have compressor issues with consistently over the last 5 years. I was able to easily replace the part we needed to last time. I'm actually looking to completely replace our appliances sometime this year because they are all having some type of issue, but our LG ones are the worst.
I just had to have my Samsung dryer repaired and the repair guy said LG has the BEST washer/dryer (especially front loaders - he really said top loaders can be pretty basic/cheap) and the worst fridges, followed closely by Samsung. He recommended GE fridges.
I just replaced my LG washer and dryer our regular appliance repair company said they were going to stop servicing all LGs because they are awful to work with to get parts and just how bad they are overall. He also recommended GE or Kenmore.
Post by amberlyrose on Jun 29, 2021 12:18:14 GMT -5
I have an older LG that we have compressor issues with consistently over the last 5 years. I was able to easily replace the part we needed to last time. I'm actually looking to completely replace our appliances sometime this year because they are all having some type of issue, but our LG ones are the worst.
Post by amberlyrose on Jun 29, 2021 1:20:25 GMT -5
After 7 pages, I am just over here stunned that referencing someone's child graphically didn't get an automatic boot. Your response was great, meganew. I'm not a prude either and I live in the city, but what you are describing would not be okay in my neighborhood either. Being aware of your window coverings is like the 1st thing we think about!
This thread does remind me that next time I'm in Philly, I need a board happy hour/gtg because y'all are the best.
I'm currently waiting for my endocrinologist in her office. I started seeing her for low thyroid, but she also addresses my PCOS. I did metformin a few years ago to see if it would help me ovulate. It didn't, but I did lose weight pretty easily. But because it wasn't helping with the lack of ovulating, we decided to stop it. (My concern at the time was fertility; I was also seeing an RE but they referred me to her for the thyroid issues.)
I've gained 15 lbs since August and I'm very, very active. I'm really kind of at a loss as to what to do besides eating like 1200 calories a day and being super hungry and lightheaded (1200 cals are what most calculators tell me to eat if I want to lose weight because I'm so short.) I'll update after my appointment if she gives me any good advice! I am kind of hoping for metformin again just to see if it will help.
If you can swing it, I HIGHLY suggest finding your resting metabolic rate through a breathing test. I am short and overweight and every app told me to eat at 1200. My RESTING rate is around 1310, which means that is the minimum I need to eat to maintain basic body functions. I learned about it from a nutritionist's tiktok (lol) but went to a dexafit near me for the test. It was like $199 for that and the body scan, which was also helpful to see where my muscle gains/losses were.
I've heard some of these places are pushy about their special diets, but if you go in just for the scan info to take to your endo, I felt like it was good knowledge to have.
It’s not a state thing. The DEA inspects pharmacies and supply. I’ve heard of this happening before from someone that does controlled substance inspections for them.
Interesting. You would think as long as they are following all rules, it wouldn’t matter how many they fill.
I think it's more for avoiding abuse. A pharmacist is going to question if the same Dr. is giving patients a ton of painkillers if their stock is limited. Pharmacist raises a red flag or refuses scripts from certain doctors, etc. Also allows the feds to easily track if a pharmacy is in cahoots with a doctor if all their controlled meds are going to one prescriber's patients.
Post by amberlyrose on Jun 24, 2021 21:25:47 GMT -5
It’s not a state thing. The DEA inspects pharmacies and supply. I’ve heard of this happening before from someone that does controlled substance inspections for them.
Post by amberlyrose on Jun 24, 2021 17:57:28 GMT -5
I use Done. and have for over a year. I take Adderall and can get my script filled in all three locations I'm in throughout the year (CO, CA, NM). I figured I was going to have a co-pay for any visit to someone local, so it's not much more out of pocket. My old GP refused to fill it as well and this was the best solution. My new GP said she could do it for Colorado but wasn't quite sure if she could do it in other states. If she can, I'll probably switch to her filling them.
Thanks! My mom is also 5th grade, so I sent the list to her.
I need to add to my little library and my sister's.
diversebookfinder.org is a great resource, as well as thebrownbookshelf.com
I've used those before If you need sets or really great prices, check out www.books4school.com. They support the Little Free Library with a portion of the book sales if you say it is for a library. If not, they are still great prices!
Post by amberlyrose on Jun 21, 2021 15:58:01 GMT -5
We have them on our house in Denver and produce enough to cover our electricity, including charging the cars. My H is looking into battery storage options within the next two years along with insulating the roof/attic because it is close to needing replacement anyway. When we first had them installed, they did not completely cover our electricity with the AC unit, but when that died, we installed an evap cooler and haven't paid for electric since
We did get some gutter damage right underneath the area where the panels are during that big storm this spring. 2ft of snow just slid right off and accumulated at the roof line.
Post by amberlyrose on Jun 18, 2021 14:01:28 GMT -5
When I had to do events for work, I regularly went for a mani and got into the dip nail thing for awhile. I don't usually paint my nails in the spring/summer but there is just something about the fall that makes me want them done all the time. My toenails grow slowly, so I can get away with a pedicure once every 2 months in sandal weather. I don't bother in the winter and if I have an event, I usually do it myself.
Post by amberlyrose on Jun 18, 2021 13:35:45 GMT -5
More on the Colorado situation, with links to the WSJ
"A law requiring companies to post pay ranges for jobs in Colorado — including remote work — has put the state in their sights. Dozens of employers are including disclaimers in postings for remote jobs that effectively say residents of the state won’t be considered. The corporate backlash against the law, aimed at reducing gender gaps and opacity around pay, has spurred one resident to build a site, ColoradoExcluded.com, that tracks such efforts by employers."
Post by amberlyrose on Jun 18, 2021 11:17:11 GMT -5
We do a few internal celebrations and learning series each year for Juneteenth, which I'm sure we'll continue to do but with more funding/resources. We don't get MLK, Veteran's Day, etc. off so I doubt we will get this as well.
The CEO of Morgan Stanley is so cute in his assumption that living in Colorado is some kind of adorably affordable adventure.
(not the point, I know, and I also know NYC is ridiculously more than anywhere, but that kind of statement makes him look, at best, out of touch)
I think this touches on a good point about runaway salaries. Cities like NY and SF have always been expensive. But the prices started getting truly ridiculous in the ‘80s thanks in part to financial deregulation, and the industries that benefited from it.
The “job is a job” argument ignores how destabilizing it is when local economies that aren’t used to having tons of people making over $250k suddenly get flooded with them. My company is adjusting salaries if you move away from SF and I’m not mad about it.
I quoted the example above because Colorado sure used to be the place where NYers and Californians were like, OMG, so cheap! But that hasn’t been true for at least a decade. It’s still cheaper but I don’t hear people waxing poetic about moving to Denver/Boulder “to finally be able to afford to buy a house.”
This conversation also has to include issues with gentrification when these smaller communities are flooded with people that can offer over locals.
Denver is a prime city that this has happened. Yes, the city has been revitalized downtown but at what cost? Almost every new neighbor on my block works from home and moved here from Chicago or the east coast.
Post by amberlyrose on Jun 17, 2021 11:03:39 GMT -5
The city of Long Beach CA is almost to 70% of eligible adults vaccinated with 90% of the elderly fully vaxxed. It was nice going to a restaurant yesterday without too much worry.
Our HOA is still deciding if we are going to keep masks on in the building because a few residents would like to. We don't have amenities or anything where people would linger, so I'm on the side of doing whatever is comfortable for them.
What is your opinion about what the end goal should be in regards to easing restrictions? I read this morning that yesterday in CA there were 0 covid deaths reported. I know we also need to not just look at deaths, but the overall picture as well and cases are also super low. It def seems like a lot of progress has been made, so it's definitely something to recognize. Even for those who can't get vaccinated, the fact that millions are vaccinated helps protect everyone else.
Oh, I'm fine with lifting restrictions, but I think the Gov's tweet was tone deaf.
Post by amberlyrose on Jun 15, 2021 18:12:04 GMT -5
California has lifted all restrictions.
Newsom's tweet annoyed me. While yes, 40 million doses were administered, that means only 20 million were vaccinated. Many responses pointed out that it's not a good day for immunocompromised. Very tone deaf, in my opinion. (edited @@ info out)
Tweet: Good morning California. It’s reopening day. We’ve administered over 40 million vaccines. Now… No more social distancing. No more capacity limits. No more colors or county tiers. And if you’re vaccinated—no more masks. It’s a good day.