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Hi!

I've joined a few monthly clubs and gone to events, but most people are a) women or b) in a relationship. In my new job I do a ton of networking, but I've met mostly women and older men at the government and community events I attend. I have no idea where all the single younger men are! My roommate is in a lot of inter-mural sports leagues and most of the time it seems to be women. In fact, her last kickball team was made up of 12 women because hardly any men signed up for the league. She was appropriately frustrated, lol.

@blissoff, I've been single for 3.5 years.

jigsy, I hope this passes quickly for you. You are totally worthy. (heart)

I had to double check it was Friday since one wasn't started already!

My FFFC love life edition:

I kind of enjoyed the audio book I listened to about finding your soulmate. I'm even considering doing some of the odd suggestions she had that she says will encourage the universe to send me my soulmate. The fact that I am considering this makes me feel a bit pathetic and desperate.

I had yet another fun, great first date from tinder and then the guy faded away. I am a one-date wonder with the guys I find attractive and I wish I understood why. It's most likely me, but I can't figure out what it is about me that allows for fun dates and no contact again.

winecat, I hope kitty comes back home safe and sound soon. Big hugs to you.

I went out with the Tinder guy tonight. I thought it went really well and I'd like to see him again, but I'm also trying to stay neutral since I hate getting excited just to be let down.

I wasn't ready, per say, but I knew it had to be done to put myself on track to a healthier, happier life. I couldn't continue being tied to someone who wasn't inspiring me to be the best version of myself (and who caused me so much stress, anxiety, and unhappiness). I think it hit me a bit more after the filing, but I think it was natural for me to have a period of mourning something I thought I'd have forever and it was a step in the right direction. I knew it had to be done to go forward, so I did it without overthinking it, just made it something that had to be done to get to a happy future.

Thank you for introducing me to this. I am in love.

Happy birthday mp! Hope the new decade is beyond fabulous!

You nailed exactly how I've been feeling with my frustrations in love and dating. I wish it were logical so I could process it more easily, but that's not how it goes unfortunately for my brain/heart.

On the birthday front, I'm not too far behind you on hitting 30 (t-minus 62 days) and I completely understand how you are feeling. I try to do things on my birthday to celebrate me now, as it used to be the anniversary of exH and I. I know I am going to have a blast on my trip, but I also know I would trade it in a heartbeat to have a meaningful relationship with a partner. I think I'm good at being single, but it's been 3.5 years of singledom. I'd like to remember what it's like to be in a relationship and actually feel the feels. I'm trying to be hopeful about love in my 30s, but sometimes it feels like I am just setting myself up for the nothingness that is my current dating life.

/end brain dump

mp...
 

Eyes: The Balm Meet Matt(e) Nude palette using Matt Abdul and Matt Hung, Maybelline the Rocket Volume mascara, and some random black eyeliner Ipsy sent me

Brows: ELF Brow Duo in Light and set with MAC Brow Set in Girl Boy

Lips: NARS gloss in Orgasmic

mp, thank you for your sweet words. My loneliness still creeps in and I think about texting him, but my exH put me through fucking hell with his flakiness and the way he made me feel so fucking disposal. I won't put myself thought that shit again.

So, my date tonight was AWFUL, lol. Dude showed up pretty drunk. He hardly talked at all and sat there with his arms crossed. I tried talking to him but seriously, he would hardly speak. I eventually gave up trying to talk and we literally sat there in silence. Finally I told him if he wanted to go he was more than welcome to. He called an Uber (thankfully), paid for my drink, hugged me and told me he had a great time. What in the motherfuck.

I need a good cry at the stupidity that is my dating life. 3.5 years of this nonsense.

1. I ended things with a guy earlier this week because his communication/planning sucked, and I hate that it sucked because when we did get together we had a lot of fun. He lacked courtesy though when changing plans and I'm not going to sit around waiting for someone who doesn't have the decency to tell me he can't make it.

2. I noticed on Instagram that a guy (who I went out with January, had a great time with, and asked me for a 2nd date and then he ghosted me) was following me still, as we had followed each other on IG on our date (and after he dropped me I unfollowed him). Why would he be following me but had ghosted me? It just caused me to think about how excited I was after our date and how it didn't work out for reasons unknown to me. I blocked him to kick him off my follower list and then unblocked him and voila, no more following. But it was annoying to see his name on my list and remember how much it sucked to have a fantastic date and then nothing.

3. I reached out to the guy I want to ask out today and I didn't hear anything back.

4. I was supposed to meet up with a guy from Tinder tonight for drinks and at the last minute he told me I should come to his friend's house because his friend is having a get-together. I'm not super comfortable in crowds, let alone one where I don't know a soul, and I told him I'd rather meet one-on-one for a drink. He replied with, "Oh come on "

So now I'm sitting here all dressed up with no one to hang out wondering why dating is so damn hard.

I really didn't like Coffee Meets Bagel. I often didn't have matches and when I did, they were also not my type.

Hi everyone! I was out of the FOTD for a few days thanks to a stye, but I'm happy to be back. Here's the past two days:



(Ignore my undone, drying hair)

Face: Rimmel Stay Matte Foundation and Powder, Tarte Amazonian Clay Bronzer in Park Ave Princess, Nyx Blush in Terra Cotta, eyebrows are filled in with ELF Brow Duo in Light and topped with MAC Brow Set in Girl Boy

Eyes: Jelly Pong 2-in-1 Eye Liner (color unknown...I used it as shadow and liner), Tarte Lights, Cameras, Lashes mascara

Lips: A mix of Wet N Wild lipstick in Java as lip liner, filled in with Nyx Butter lipstick in Pops, and topped with Lorac Lip Lustre Creme in Tiara



I can't remember much about this one other than on my lips is Urban Decay Revolution High-Color lip gloss in Bittersweet (Ipsy sample. The staying power was good on this but damn this is a sticky gloss...my lips actually clung to each other.) On my lower lids is Urban Decay 24/7 liner in Asphyxia

Today was long and short. I went to a county board meeting tonight for work and they way they do it seems so...archaic? Anyway, I got home late and have a headache now. I'll probably go to bed early. I need to unload the dishwasher but I don't wanna!

My room is a mess but I am choosing to ignore it tonight. Adulthood for the win.