She sounds similar to my 6.5 year old. A large part of the reason we decided to pursue medication for her ADHD was because she was hurting people, particularly her toddler brother and classmates. Sometimes it was pure impulsivity, not a rage reaction. She'd run in for a hug with so much force it would literally knock an adult of their feet. She'd stroll past her brother and clock him on the head or shove him off the stool and carry on walking. Other times, when a kindergarten classmate cut in front of her in line she'd respond with 10x the appropriate amount of rage and would physically assault them. She just could not keep her body to herself.
There's also been suggestions of an ODD diagnosis too. But once we figured out the right medication and dosage for her after lots of trial and error, the hitting and impulsive behavior really stopped. Things aren't perfect, but she's not hurting people anymore. She seems much more in control of herself and less prone to risky/impulsive behavior.
Not quite the same situation, but I've been in a romantic relationship for the past year with a colleague who lives in another state 2000 miles from me. We began dating in January 2020 and saw one another a couple times and then the pandemic shut everything down. I haven't seen him in 13 months because we haven't been able to travel safely. Despite the fact that we both can work remotely, we both have young kids in our respective states and probably won't be able to relocate to live with one another anytime soon, so in talking through the long-term future of our relationship the things we think may be challenges are: pandemics causing travel restrictions (hah), kids sports and extracurricular activities making it hard for us to travel because we don't want to miss those important events, having to pay for pet sitters, the expense of maintaining two separate homes and lives, each of us building our own separate lives that don't overlap in a meaningful day-to-day way...
I wouldn't choose this situation. It's extremely challenging. We are also in the early-dating madly in love with one another stage so any distance whatsoever is excruciating, and I recognize you are at a slightly different place in life with an older child so your proposed situation might be more tolerable.
DD(6.5) has been Adderall XR for the last 6 months but I haven't noticed it impacting her sleep much. She's always been a total insomniac, so that's just a constant challenge. The only way she falls alseep without a monumental struggle is with melatonin. I'd say her sleep challenges are the same and haven't gotten worse since starting Adderall.
I use a great high SPF Japanese sunscreen called Biore Watery Essence. It’s very thin, lightweight, and instantly sinks into your skin without any residue. It’s so much better than any of the American ones I’ve ever tried, I think they have advanced sunscreen technology in Japan compared to here
My friend goes by his full name Sebastian. It never occurred to me to need to shorten it. His closest pals call him by an unrelated nickname but I like the full name!
I have two Graco Turboboosters and LOVE them. So lightweight and easy to move around...converts to a regular booster...easy for her to buckle herself in (has trouble with other boosters)....comfortable...inexpensive!
My kids have the Hape one pictured above - it was passed down to us when my oldest was 18 months and they still both use it constantly at ages 3 and 6. One of the best toys we've owned!
My 5 year old who has not been known for her good sportsmanship just started playing Catan Jr with us and she’s been great about it even when she loses. I think she enjoys the more drawn out building process that lets her have ownership in a lot of small decisions so it feels like lots of small wins. Moving the Ghost Pirate to block other players happens frequently so that also feels like good, competitive play for her that lets her “beat” other players in small ways. Bonus is that it’s a fun game for grownups too, especially if you enjoy Settlers of Catan!
My 5 year old who has not been known for her good sportsmanship just started playing Catan Jr with us and she’s been great about it even when she loses. I think she enjoys the more drawn out building process that lets her have ownership in a lot of small decisions so it feels like lots of small wins. Moving the Ghost Pirate to block other players happens frequently so that also feels like good, competitive play for her that lets her “beat” other players in small ways. Bonus is that it’s a fun game for grownups too, especially if you enjoy Settlers of Catan!
I’m honestly shocked that I might be the only one to say it’s been better than expected. I was fully prepared for all the hellfire and fury that a new kindergartener would unleash on us after a long day at school. She has a new ADHD diagnosis and we just moved to a new town so I expected the worst. But she has a fabulous teacher who keeps her really engaged and believes in lots of outdoor play and zero homework That, combined with the rhythm and predictability of school has been very good for my daughter. She’s been much happier and nicer to Be around. Definitely worn out and ready for bed at bedtime though, which is not a bad thing either, given her history of insomnia.
Right at, or just under 25%. We are in a high cost of living area but have a pretty high HHI and will soon be done with daycare payments and low to no debt. We aren't comfortable going higher, because we are relatively risk averse and also want to save for kids' college and we like to travel.
We had a ton of Playmobil growing up (my mom still has it) and I used it way into my middle school years, playing with my siblings. We had a lot of farm animals and covered wagons and stuff and that got a lot of play and still does when my kids go to Grammy's.
My DD (5) has a Playmobil doll house, which is really versatile because you can arrange the house decor and pieces in so many different configurations. She also likes her fairy garden. We acquired a huge Playmobil pirate ship and all the accompanying pieces from a friend for like $10 and it is a big favorite when kids come over to play - it's very impressive.
I’ve known my daughter’s kindergarten teacher for years, though we aren’t super close. We used to work together briefly. She asks the students to call her Ms. Firstname so I plan to call her that in earshot of DD and just Firstname when speaking to her or emailing her. I kind of wish she’d use Ms. Lastname honestly though...it seems strangely informal for the kids to use her first name!
I had a kids cookbook of foods from around the world, when I was a kid. I loved trying new recipes from it and they were all very simple.
Another idea is one I think I picked up years ago on this board. Let your kid pick out a new vegetable or fruit they’ve never tried, every week at the grocery store. Then you go home and look up how to prepare it and learn together. There are some super random vegetables and exotic fruits at the grocery store. Could be fun!
My friends had their kids try to list off every ingredient in the meal, during dinner, down to the spices. We have adopted this and it’s taught our 2 and 5 year old a lot about what makes up a dish. They LOVE the game and it makes for fun dinner conversation. (We like to cook and we engage them in the process of making meals often).
I started wearing contacts at age 9. It was a bit challenging to get them in at first, but I figured it out. I never had glasses to fall back on and my vision was so poor that i was highly motivated to get those suckers in my eyes. I do recall needing to sit at the dining room table with a mirror each morning for quite a while, so I could get up close and see what I was doing without fear of losing the contacts while I was putting them in.
Bucky 40 Blinks - they are contoured so don’t press against your eyes. You can get them on amazon and are less than $20. bucky.com/collections/sleep-eye-masks
It might be a phase, it might be typical or atypical for her developmental stage. It’s hard to say, but I too recommend seeing a developmental psychologist if you are at your wits end. She sounds a lot like my daughter at that age. She got diagnosed this week at age 5, with ADHD and honestly it’s a relief to know I’m not just bad at parenting but that we have some different things to work on and we are not alone. Three was really, really hard for my daughter and my heart goes out to you. It does get a lot better at age four and five, I promise!!
I recommend having him do it on Thurs or Friday when you have a chill weekend planned. DH got his done on a weekend when we had back to back friend's backyard parties to attend and he was still in a bit of discomfort for about a week after the procedure. He hobbled around at both of these parties with an ice pack shoved down his pants, telling everyone all about how much his junk hurt. It was a bit mortifying. lol
You've got good advice. I have kids nearly the same age and while I don't get summers off, I can commiserate with feeling like I'd rather be doing anything than hanging out with them at times.
I find the instagram account Simply On Purpose to be very, very helpful. She explains positive parenting in a way that really clicks for me, and makes it easier to put into practice in real life better than Janet Lansbury IMO. My 5 yo is very challenging but I've seen great results from focusing super hard on the positive and ignoring all but the most consequential negative behaviors - see SOP's instagram stories for more on this.
I also am seeing good results from the strategy outlined in a book that was recommended by our 5 yo's pediatric behaviorist. It's called Raising Human Beings: Creating a Collaborative Partnership with Your Child. It requires really intentional parenting but the philosophy of helping your kid join you in a collaborative process on coming up with solutions to their undesirable behaviors makes a ton of sense to me because long-term they need to have those skills to be successful in life. Our daughter is really responding well to us using the techniques here. www.amazon.com/gp/product/1476723761/ref=ppx_yo_dt_b_asin_title_o02_s00?ie=UTF8&psc=1
Finally, I agree with the poster who said that setting expectations prior to doing things helps. I will turn to both my kids before we get out of the car and say, "Ok, we are going into the store. My expectation is that you stay in the cart, talk quietly, don't run away from me, yadda yadda yadda. Now - how do we behave in the store?" And they repeat it back to me. For whatever reason, it reduces bad behavior tenfold. Whatever works!
The strange part to me is that we are only hearing about this happening to American tourists. Is that our narrow-viewed media or is there something else going on?
I can’t find reports of anyone from any other country dying at the resorts. I’d imagine the majority of tourists there are American, though.
I don’t know much about the current situation but I used to live in the DR and most of the tourists are actually European.
We did a set of private lessons followed by a set of group lessons (3 kids) for my almost-five-year-old this spring. The private lessons were 2-3 times more expensive but IMO were worth every penny. But my daughter thrived on the one on one attention - she's hyperactive and impulsive and the private lessons had her constantly focused and swimming the entire time. She had so much fun. But in the group lessons, she horsed around when it wasn't her turn to swim, wasn't focused when it was her turn and generally I felt like she learned wayyyyy less. I'd rather spend $150 and get something out of it, than spend $60 and get nothing out of it. But my kid may be a special case
They have a big following in the running community because they're lightweight, water resistant, and they conduct sound through the facial bones instead of sitting directly in your ear, which allows you to stay alert to oncoming traffic or other safety concerns while exercising. I love them so much - I use them around the house all the time listening to podcasts but I can also keep an ear out for my kids. I use them at work for calls all the time too.
I thought they'd be weird but they have great sound quality and are really comfortable. You can get good deals around Black Friday, I think.
I have Just Between Us and it's so awesome. I haven't used it yet since my daughter is only 5 but I can't wait to get started when she's a bit older. I got my mom the Just Between Us: Grandmother & Granddaughter book and it, too, looks great.
I got the adjustable as I think I read it was smaller on the tightest setting than the stretch band would be. My daughter is newly 5, super tiny wrists, very active and it stays on fine. It's definitely a bit loose but no so much that she can easily turn it all the way around on her wrist. She has to work really hard to slide it off without unbuckling it.
She absolutely loves it. She's very motivated by getting her 60 mins of activity a day and getting a new move on the accompanying app on my phone. I wasn't sure if she'd stay interested in it or not, but I've been pleasantly surprised!
We just went to Club Med Ixtapa Pacific in January and we loved it. We had a 22 month old and a 4 year old and we were looking for a super relaxing vacation with kids clubs for little ones. It was amazing. The kids had a great time in their clubs and were really well taken care of. I’d go back again in a heartbeat.
I think the answer is that brain injury is really individual depending on the specific circumstances on the specific individual. I hope your nephew has a really good outcome. My experience with anoxic brain injury is that my dad experienced ten minutes of complete oxygen deprivation to his brain when his heart stopped during a surgery. He can walk and talk but has a very severe global brain injury (oxygen deprivation affected his entire brain, which is different than a brain injury caused by a bleed in one region or a blunt force trauma to a specific part of the head) and he has no short term memory anymore. Imagine a person in the last stages of dementia. The brain injury also affects him in other ways that are very characteristic of brain injury - lack of inhibition, lack of ambition, flat affect, etc. Again though, I've been around a lot of people with brain injuries since my dad's event and everyone is really different in terms of ability. It will remain to be seen for your nephew and I truly pray for the best possible outcome for him!
My daughter rode a bike early but she's very physical and took to her strider bike from age 2 onward. However, I totally think this is kid-dependent and just one of those things a parent can introduce but not force. For instance, I follow a professional triathlete on social media and his nearly-6 year old son only just decided he wanted to ride a bike. Despite having very athletic, bike-riding parents (who I'm sure were DYING for him to love the bike) he was just not into it. Til suddenly one day he was, and he learned quickly. I guess my advice would be to keep offering it and push a little but allow your child to dictate when they're ready.
I have backpacked extensively, I own expensive boots from REI and I live in the Pacific NW. But honestly, unless you are going on an all day hike, or anticipate walking through a lot of unavoidable puddles/streams or snow I don't think you need to spend much money on hiking boots. I just went on a 3 hour day hike with my family and we were in very cold and wet conditions, walking on half-flooded, muddy trails behind waterfalls and I was the only one in hiking boots. All the adults wore running shoes or rubber boots and they were totally happy, they just had to hop around puddles or be sure to cross boggy areas carefully.
If you think you will be able to get back to base and change into dry shoes within a few hrs, you may be just fine in non-waterproof shoes. Just bring a few pair because you shouldn't count on them drying out quickly in the cabin. You can also probably get by with some used or cheap hiking boots that you DIY waterproof with Nikwax www.nikwax.com/usblog/how-to-clean-waterproof-shoes-and-boots/. This stuff is easy to use and works great! (For the record, you can use it to re-waterproof your rain or ski jackets very effectively - use the Nikwax stuff made for that purpose, and just throw it in the washing machine.)
We just got the RideSafer Vest for my 4 year old who weighs 37.5 lbs She's very proud of that .5 lb. I haven't tried it out yet, but we do a fair bit of traveling and I don't want to have to tote 2 carseats all by myself through international airports when I'm traveling alone.
I am a bit of a car seat safety nut so I researched the heck out of this vest. It sounds totally safe and legal in the US for this age and weight and it's well-reviewed and recommended by all the reputable car seat safety blogs. I'm looking forward to trying it out on our trip next week.