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Your friends love you and want you to be happy. My friends initially supported me when I said I wanted to try to work things out with exH because they hated seeing me in pain and they wanted me to be happy. What I didn't realize is that they were also struggling to cope with learning about exH's manipulations/lies/etc and not really able to fully grasp the situation of who we all thought someone was versus him showing us who he was. It's been 6 years since I found out my exH is a lying liar who lies, and my friends still comment how they can't believe what happened...one friend in particular really struggled with the perception versus reality of the entire situation of how someone we all loved could be so deceptive and uncaring.

All that said, my point is that I really hope you'll enter into therapy and discuss this with a unbiased person. My friends, while they love me so much and wanted me to be happy, were the worst advice givers in this situation. They were conflicted on what to say to help me because they wanted me to be happy. They knew I wanted exH to change and save our relationship and they thought it would make me happy, so they supported the idea of reconciliation.

Therapy was my saving grace. It helped me understand why I wasn't willing to cut off someone who treated me in the most disrespectful manner who hadn't even had the decency to tell me himself about his bad behavior (the OW did, much like your situation). It helped me not get looped in my own justifications when justifications weren't valid for his behaviors. Therapy honestly is the reason I let my exH go. I'm not saying you'll have the same path, but there are red flags in your responses to this situation that suggest you are not putting your own self-worth and self-interests first here. He lied to you, for a year plus. He engaged in inappropriate behavior for the entirety of your monogamous relationship. He never told you what he was doing and completely minimized his role in the inappropriate behavior when he was found out. It appears that he would have kept his role downplayed to you if not for the OW providing receipts. All excuses aside, even just those three realities don't reflect the heart of a man who genuinely loved and cared about his fiancee. You loved him and trusted him, and it is clear from the outside that he took advantage of your lovely heart. We all care about you here, and you know that advice comes out in different forms/tones, but ultimately we think you are a beautiful soul who deserves nothing but the best and we want to be sure that you to feel the same way about yourself as you navigate this situation.

Also, it's my first time wearing this dress today and I love it. I saw Taylor Swift wear a similar dress awhile back and I've pined for one since then.

Honestly, if you truly want kids, lay that out to him clearly. If he says he doesn't or waivers, let him go if children are a deal breaker. I wouldn't suggest contact with him because you're not going to be able to let go when you're doing things like meeting his family. It's not too late to dial back if kids are your line in the sand, even though you love his family. How do you walk away from that...you just do so you can have a chance of fulfilling your dreams of a family.

I understand why you want to give him an opportunity to repair what he's done and to make great changes; I was the same way and did the same thing when I found out my exH was cheating/had lied. From personal experience, I would highly suggest that while he has this opportunity given to him that for your own good you enforce a no-contact rule with him. That is truly one of my biggest regrets: that I kept in contact with him, trying to be the "positive" in his life that I hoped would inspire him to reach his potential and make changes. I should have used that time to work on myself, give my heart time to heal, and then checked in 6 months later (just throwing out a time frame). He's a grown adult with the option to make positive life changes and either he will or he won't. Being in contact with him shouldn't be a determining factor for him if he really wants help and wants a 2nd chance with you. If you check-in and he hasn't taken proactive steps, then you'll have your answer about how serious he was about his chance.

I know this is such a horrible spot to be in, but I sincerely hope you'll put your well-being first and foremost, berbles.

loonylunalovegood, how do you like the colourpop metallic lip products? I almost bought some today.

Tomorrow.

www.thekyliejenner.com/glam/1100-kylie-jenner-eyeshadow-palette-video/

I really like the tutorial, and to be honest, I love the colors she chose for the palette.

Hey, long time no see!

Today is my normal day off, but I have a speaking engagement for work this afternoon at 3pm. I need to get moving to get a few things done; instead I've eaten too much and am slothing around the apartment.

A piece of art I ordered is supposed to come in today, eek! I can't wait! I've thought about this purchase for probably a year and found a really great discount last week, so I finally ordered it. I hope it looks the way I envisioned it would.

My friend and I listened to the Hamilton soundtrack last night. Her mind was blown in the best way because it's so damn awesome. She's already texted me about this morning, lol.

Deadly ISIS attack in Kabul leaves Afghanistan in mourning
2 suicide bombers targeted peaceful protest by members of the predominantly Shia ethnic Hazara community

www.cbc.ca/beta/news/world/kabul-suicide-attack-afghanistan-day-of-mourning-1.3692873

The Associated Press
4 Hours Ago
AFGHANISTAN-PROTESTS/
An Afghan man weeps outside a hospital after a suicide attack in Kabul, Afghanistan, July 23, 2016. The country has declared a national day of mourning in the wake of the deadly suicide bombing. (Mohammad Ismail/Reuters)
78 shares
Afghanistan marked a national day of mourning on Sunday, a day after at least 80 people were killed by a suicide bomber attack on a peaceful demonstration. The attack was claimed by the Islamic State of Iraq and Syria (ISIS).

Funerals were due to begin quietly in western Kabul as families collected their dead from hospitals and morgues across the capital, and graves were dug in preparation.

Authorities say another 231 people were wounded, some seriously, in the attack Saturday afternoon on a march by members of the ethnic Hazara community, who are predominantly Shia Muslim. Most Afghans are Sunni, and ISIS regards Shia as apostates.

ISIS-claimed blast strikes protest in Kabul, killing at least 80
ISIS has had a presence in Afghanistan for the past year, mainly in the eastern province of Nangarhar along the Pakistani border. The Afghan military, backed by U.S. troops, is planning an offensive against ISIS positions in Nangarhar in coming days.

Pipeline protest

It was the first ISIS attack on Kabul — and the city's worst since a vicious Taliban insurgency began 15 years ago — raising concerns about the group's reach and capability in Afghanistan.

AFGHANISTAN-BLAST/
Broken glass and debris are seen inside a restaurant a day after a suicide attack in Kabul that killed at least 80 people. (Mohammad Ismail/Reuters)
Prior to the Saturday attack, thousands of Hazaras had marched through Kabul to demand the rerouting of a power line through their impoverished province of Bamiyan, in the central highlands. It was their second demonstration; the first was in May with had a much better turnout and attended by senior Hazara politicians who were absent from Saturday's march.

The office of President Ashraf Ghani said that march organizers had been warned to call off the demonstration after intelligence was received that an attack was likely.

Hazaras face discrimination

Daud Naji, a member of the Enlighten Movement which organized the marches, said on Sunday that they had been told only that there was a "heightened risk" of attack and had subsequently cancelled nine of 10 planned routes.

Hazaras account for about 15 per cent of Afghanistan's population, estimated at around 30 million, and often complain of discrimination. During the Taliban's 1996-2001 rule, Hazaras were often brutalized more than other ethnic groups.

The Saturday attack has raised concerns about sectarianism, and the Interior Ministry announced a ban on public gatherings and demonstrations in a potential bid to avoid any inter-communal strife. A presidential spokesman pointed out that the ban on public gatherings would not apply to funerals for Saturday's victims.

AFGHANISTAN-PROTESTS/
An Afghan woman weeps at the site of a suicide attack in Kabul, which killed dozens and injured hundreds. (Mohammad Ismai/Reuters)
Hazara demonstrators have continued to occupy Demazang Square, where the attack took place as the march was winding down and some were preparing to set up a camp, Naji said, until three conditions had been met.

He said the Enlighten Movement wished to have its own representatives, as well as others from international human rights organizations, involved in a commission Ghani has established to investigate the incident.

The movement also wanted the pipeline rerouted through Bamiyan, as originally demanded. The multi-million-dollar regional project was routed away from Bamiyan by the previous Afghan government for financial considerations, according to people involved in the planning, who have spoken on condition that they not be named as they are not authorized to speak publicly on the issue.

AFGHANISTAN-BLAST/
An Afghan security guard keeps watch in front of a damaged building a day after the devastating attack. (Mohammad Ismail/Reuters)
And, Naji said, they wanted the name of Demazang Square changed to Shahada or Martyrs' Square, "to honour the memories of those who were killed, along with a picture of everyone who died there."

Ghani's spokesman, Haroon Chakhansuri confirmed that the president has issued a decree to change the name of the square as the Hazaras have asked

The death toll was not yet finalized Sunday, according to the Interior Ministry. The ministry said on Saturday that 80 people were killed; Naji said the Enlighten Movement puts the toll so far at 84.

There was also confusion about the exact nature of the attack, with many witnesses claiming the suicide bombers had been supplemented with explosives contained in an ice-cream cart. Officials on Saturday said there were two suicide bombers wearing explosive-packed clothing. One detonated himself, the other was shot by police before he was able to blow himself up, they said.

Glad it went well and I hope recovery is just as smooth!

Do it whenever you want. If a guy thinks you're slutty for not waiting long enough, he's a douche canoe who you shouldn't want to know any longer.

My family will be here any minute. God I hope this goes okay since I barely know them.

My cat is driving me insane. He will not shut up unless I am holding him or petting him. I swear he's like this every month around full moon time.

Exciting shoofly!

I hope it goes well doglove!

Today has flown by. I need to make a list so I can run to the grocery store, but ugh, I don't want to! Can't the food just appear in my pantry/fridge?

I also really need to clean my apartment before my family comes to town. Again, I don't want to. I just want to be lazy!

pinkdutchtulips, I hope for your and your dd's sake he stays far away with no contact.

I wish I made more money. I need to seriously buckle down and figure out what I need to do to make this happen.

I have some family coming in this weekend that sprang this on me with very short notice. I extended the offer some time ago, but given the relationship I have with this portion of family, it's probably best that a) it was short notice and b) it's a very short trip (2 days). I'm trying to be positive and get excited about the visit, but truthfully I'm not looking forward to it. I need an attitude adjustment.

No, I don't. I figure we all slip up grammatically. If it's repeated, then I assess from there. And sometimes phones are to blame for bad grammar. My phone is always trying to change days of the week to possessive. It would have me say, "I'm off work on Monday's." Which is WRONG. It's MONDAYS. Plural! No apostrophe!

I would never consider dating someone who said/wrote "kewl." Ew.